2013.09.24 03:14 Sauganash Geezers
A place for Geezers
2020.10.19 18:01 youto2 It Just Means More - Part Four
Baker and June approach each other and they lock up in a collar and elbow tie-up, and June quickly gets an upper hand and pushes Baker back as he falls back against his corner! Crowd:
WOOOOOO!!!! JUNE! JUNE! JUNE!
Baker looks equal parts pissed and frightened as he immediately tags out to Flux! Crowd:
Flux meekly enters the ring and sees a very determined June staring down at him, and he takes a second, pulls out a half-eaten baby carrot from his pocket, munches it down, swallows, then motions for June to come at him! June approaches and the two now lock up in a collar and elbow tie-up, and June pulls Flux in and pulls him up in an early attempt at a uranage that Flux wriggles out of behind June! June turns around and tries for a massive lariat that Flux narrowly ducks by leaning back like he’s playing Limbo, before diving and smacking the hand of Baker, who looks displeased he’s been tagged in and takes his sweet time sloooowlllyyy leaning through the ropes into the ring. Paisner:
June is a brick wall tonight! She’s not letting any of the out of the ring distractions stopping her from bringing it! Woodbridge:
She nearly took Flux’s head off right after she nearly planted him! She seems bent on turning these two inside out!
Baker has finally made it into the ring as Mia makes sure to stand between him and June, who wanted to get her hands on Jim while he was on the ropes. Baker barks at Mia to keep June off him as he keeps one hand on the ropes, and eventually, June backs off and Baker takes his hand off the ropes and now circles June, and as they circle each other they eventually meet in the middle and Baker quickly gets the go-behind on June, grabbing her arm and yanking it into a hammerlock as he wrenches Junes arm behind her back. June reacts quickly, reaching up and grabbing the head of Baker like a snap mare, before pulling herself down to one knee, rolling on her shoulders, and now powering out of the hold to put Baker in a side headlock! Crowd:
LET’S GO GAZERS! clap clap clapclapclap
LET’S GO GAZERS! clap clap clapclapclap
Jim Baker looks caught off guard by the strength of June, grasping at the arm around his neck, and he tries pulling her arm off, but June swiftly transitions with a side takedown of Baker! Baker is now on his back in the headlock, but he lifts his legs with a headscissor and takes her down, pinning June’s head to the mat! But she kips up and out of the hold, then grabs the leg of Baker and rolls on top of him, pinning him beneath her! Mia drops down for the cover, but before she can get a 1 count Baker kicks out hard! Now both competitors get to their feet and Baker goes for a clothesline, but June ducks and gets momentum off the ropes now before charging at Baker, who ducks a forearm and grabs the hair of June, throwing her down to her back! Crowd:
The referee scolds Baker with emphasis that she will disqualify him the next time he does that, and he puts his hands up as if to say ok, before soccer kicking June in the midsection! Woodbridge:
Ooof, I heard that one clear as day!
June clutches at her ribs, getting to her feet while attempting to put distance between her and Baker but she is now in the enemy corner as Baker launches himself with a corner splash that sandwiches the Stargazer between the turnbuckles while Baker tags Flux simultaneously. Baker keeps June in the corner, launching a knee into her gut that doubles her over right as Flux jumps off the ropes and hits June with a bulldog! Paisner:
It’s worth mentioning that these two, Baker and Flux, have never tagged before in a ring! Flux and The Milkman have tagged, but this duo of The Horde hasn’t seen the ring together. They have to be considered immense underdogs in the face of the nearly half a year reign of the Stargazers. Woodbridge:
They’re doing pretty good for themselves right now though!
Flux brings June up to her feet and hits her with a standing arm drag, keeping control of the arm and hitting her with a cross armbar! June doesn’t let it last long though as she grits through the pain and gets to her knees, lifting the smaller Flux up off his back and into the air, but Flux lets go and flips back onto his feet, and popping up and hitting June with a enzuigiri! June is taken down to one knee! Paisner:
The Horde really does have June reeling here!
Now Flux runs sees June on one knee, and Flux gets a running start back onto the ropes, tagging Baker, and coming off the ropes and hitting June with a running neckbreaker that slams her onto the mat, while Baker now enters the ring and comes down with a running elbow to the chest of June! Baker jumps up and stretches his arms out wide to unanimous boos from the crowd! Crowd:
ELBOW TO THE BOOB! We saw a glimpse of Baker showing some respect, now we get a front row seat right back to how he acts with people he doesn’t. But I think he oughta cover instead of pissing off this crowd even more! Crowd:
BA-KER SUCKS! BA-KER SUCKS!
Baker now looks pissed off in return as he now proceeds to stomp on Kat over and over, kicking her midsection, then grabbing her arm and driving a knee into her bicep! June cries out in pain and Kat seems to look over from the apron for the first time in the match, looking distressed to see June in pain! Baker now sits June up and slams a knee into her back, before stretching her arms back in a surfboard stretch, and June is still in it but looks in agony as Baker wrenches her arms and shoulders further and further from where they should be! Kat leans over the top rope and yells to June! Kat:
Come on, June!!! Fight back!
June seems to perk up at the sound of Kat’s voice, and a second wind comes to her as June now begins to fight back against Baker, gradually pulling her arms back from Baker’s grasp, but he now cocks back his knee and drives it into the back of June, causing her to collapse back and Baker now pulls her arms even further! Crowd:
PLEASE DON’T TAP! PLEASE DON’T TAP!
Mia So Hung is right on top of June asking her if she wants to quit! June staves off the question, refusing to quit but looking wore down from the hold! Kat on the apron now stomps on the mat to get the crowd to clap and rally for June, and the whole venue is stomping their feet cheering on June to break free of the hold, and she takes on more burst of strength, pulling the arms of Baker in and throwing him over her head, before rolling back and leaping to tag in Kat Anavae-Emery! Crowd:
Kat now looks entirely focused as Baker gets back to his feet, and Kat jumps to the top springboard and clears half the ring to catch Baker with a hurricanrana that flips him hard onto his back! Kat kips up notices Flux trying to enter the ring but she takes him out with a jumping leg lariat that sends Dexter over the ropes flying to the outside! Crowd:
YEAAAAAAAA!!!!! KAT! KAT! KAT!
Kat gets to her feet in the ring but is pushed face first into the corner by Baker, and now Baker charges at her but Kat grabs the top ropes and jumps back into the air, floating over Baker before grabbing his shoulders and bringing him down into a backstabber! Crowd:
Baker is now down in his own corner with no teammate on the apron as Kat gets to the top rope, and she looks over at June on the opposite corner, who puts up a heart shape with her hands! Kat looks at June, seemingly hesitating to return the gesture, when she suddenly topples to the mat when Flux hops onto the apron and dropkicks her ankles, and she lands on the back of her neck in a scary fall! Crowd:
Kat can’t let what’s happened outside of the ring get to her right now! This is not looking like the same team that won the titles!
Baker is still clutching at his back but has enough wherewithal to make a cover on Kat, hooking the leg! 1! 2
NO, June dove to break up the pin! June brings Baker to his feet and kicks him in the gut, and lifts him up into a powerbomb position, and June yells for Kat for the double team, but as June holds Baker up, she realizes Kat hasn’t gotten up as Mia is now checking on Kat, and Baker takes advantage of the delay and jabs a thumb right into the eye of June as she lets go of Baker, who lands on one foot and DECKS June with a forearm that knocks her back into the ropes! Crowd:
But she bounces off the ropes and hits the Lover’s Lariat
that turns Baker inside out!!! Crowd:
June now checks to make sure Kat is okay, as Mia asks Kat if she is able to continue. Kat is coming to and June offers a hand to lift Kat to her feet, but we now see Dexter Flux hit the ring as Baker has rolled out, making Flux the legal man as he whips June out of the ring, leaving just him and Kat as he pulls her up and hits a modified victory roll pin
! 1! 2! KICKOUT! Paisner:
Kat NARROWLY avoids losing the titles there to The Horde! Flux had the element of surprise with the crafty pin but even in such a dazed state Kat has it at the forefront of her mind what’s at stake here!
Flux attempts to quickly follow up, grabbing her arm as she sits up and rolling her up
with another pin combination! 1! 2! NO!
June has entered the ring again and breaks up the pin, and she pulls Flux off Kat and pulls him up onto her shoulders! June has Flux over one shoulder but Flux is flailing as chaotically as he can, and now we see Baker slide into the ring and chop blocks June, as she falls to one knee again and Flux falls to his feet! Flux kicks June in the gut as Baker then snapmares her, and Flux hits a dropkick to the seated June as Baker now goes to kick Kat out of the ring! Paisner:
It’s just Baker and Flux in the ring with June! They’ve cleared the ring and now June looks yet again in peril!
Dexter Flux now goes to the top rope and signals for the elbow drop! He jumps off and lands it square on the chest of June Emery-Anavae, and Baker looks like he’s celebrating on the apron now as Mia drops down to count! 1! 2! 3-NO!
SHE’S NOT DONE YET!
Baker holds his head in disbelief as Flux looks up at him as if to ask what to do next. Flux walks over and tags Baker, and Baker now enters the ring and puts June’s head between his legs, and lifts her up for the powerbomb, and slams her down! Paisner:
Those tag titles are on the edge of changing hands right now! Things are looking dire for the Stargazers tonight!
Baker now spreads his arms yet again and trash talks everyone in the audience who are booing him relentlessly while he brags above the body of June! Baker gets behind June as she slowly begins to come to, barely able to bring herself to one knee, and Flux yells at Baker to go for it already as Baker waits til the very last second for June to rise up! Woodbridge:
Don’t turn around, June!!!
June is drowsy on her feet as she turns and Baker scoops her up! Paisner:
Here it comes- The Baker Bomb- WAIT, Kat’s back in it!
Kat has now hopped on the apron and grabbed the foot of June, preventing Baker from slamming her down! Flux is quick to stop Kat though, lifting Kat onto his shoulders as he begins spinning her on the apron in an airplane spin! But in the ring, June has now wriggled out of the slam, and to roll up Baker in a small package! 1! 2! KICKOUT!
June looks over to her corner, and Kat is still being spun around in the Airplane Spin on the apron! June sees Baker approaching and she ducks a right swing, and June fires back with a forearm to Baker’s face! Crowd:
But Baker fires back with a right hand that rocks June! Crowd:
June stumbles, but maintains her balance and comes back at Baker with a forearm that snaps his head back! Crowd:
Baker swings back, but this time it’s a straight up slap to June’s face! Crowd:
OOOOOHHHHHH!!! YOU FUCKED UP! YOU FUCKED UP!
June looks incensed, as she swings once more with everything she has, but Baker dodges and knees June in the gut! Crowd:
Baker looks over at Flux on the ring, who is STILL spinning Kat around! Baker:
DEXTER!!! TOSS HER IN HERE!!!
Flux hears the call and attempts to toss Kat into the ring, and he does, but after he lets go, he is so dizzy he falls off the apron onto the outside! Kat now lays in the ring looking like she doesn’t know what year it is, as June looks over at Kat, and for a brief moment they make eye contact, and as Baker looks over at his partner who spilled to the outside, June gets a running start off the ropes and hits Baker with an uppercut to the back of the head! Paisner:
UPPERCUT! And if Kat can hit the swinging neckbreaker, they’ll connect with the same tag team move that won them the tag titles in April!!!
Kat props herself up on the ropes, and she lines up her sights on the stunned Baker, before running at Baker, but she’s too slow and disoriented as Baker is able to grab her by the hair as she charges and throws her right into June, and the two collide with a CRACK
as their two skulls connect! Crowd:
June falls back onto the mat and spills onto the apron as Baker rolls up Kat Anavae-Emery! 1! 2! 3! DING DING DING! Crowd: MASS NOISES OF CONFUSION Baker:
Baker pumps his fist to the air repeatedly as he stumbles over to ringside and snatches the two tag titles to hold up in the middle of the ring! Paisner:
I’m.. speechless! I can’t believe we just saw that! Woodbridge:
Did Jim Baker just pin one of the Tag Team Champions, Paisner?! Did that just happen? Javier:
Your winners, at a time of 17:30, Jim Baker and Dexter Flux: THE HOOOORRRDEEE!! Crowd:
Baker simply smiles under the avalanche of booing fans as he has his hand raised by Mia So Hung and he now slides under the ropes to the outside as he shows both the titles to the still-disoriented Flux, who barely seems aware of whats happening. Baker shows off both titles to fans in attendance as they jeer him and give thumbs down to the ecstatic champion. Baker outstretches both arms with either tag title in grasp as he yells to the world that he is now 2 and 4. Paisner:
I… I know I said anything could happen in WiR, but I honestly don’t think I believed myself when I said it! Jim Baker and Dexter Flux are Tag Team champions!
We now see Kat in the ring, being checked on by Mia as she clutches at her head, slowly taking in what’s happened. June is also discombobulated on the apron, and the two exchange a pained, unsure glance at each other as Kat averts her gaze to Baker on the outside. Paisner:
Ladies and gentlemen, after that title exchange, we’re gonna need a break to take in what happened just now. We have new Tag Team Champions.
We see the ring and ringside clear out. As after a moment, we see Javier enter the ring, ready to announce more. Javier:
Esteemed Guests, the following is a match to crowd the Interim WiR World Champion, it is a 25 minute 6 man championship scramble match, and is is your main event of the evening! Crowd:
The rules are that in a championship scramble, pinfalls and submissions can happen many times up until the final time limit, where upon the person with the final victory will be crowned champion! U Mad (Clean Version) by Vic Mensa
BLASTS through the speakers, as Dan Smith comes out onto the entranceway. Wearing a button up with the jamacian flag on it in addition to his normal ring gear that he quickly takes off. As he looks focused and ready to go, pumping up the crowd as he begins to sprint his way down. Crowd:
Now a man who’s been waiting for this for a long while, and the biggest underdog in the match. The Stormin’ Mormon Dan Smith finally gets his title opportunity he earned after a victory over Austin Balandran. And honestly? I may peg him as having better odds in a match like this than a one-on-one. An experience gap between wrestlers may really shine in a one-on-one, but with so many more factors going into a six man match? There’s much more chances for an unexpected winner to slip on through.
Smith slaps hands with fans along the way, as he makes his way to the ring apron quickly, slides in, head to the turnbuckles, and does a few excited fist bumps to hype himself and the crowd up. STUPID by Ashnikko
sounds throughout the venue, as GiGi skips out onto the entranceway, clad in a bright neon blue wig, with a significant dose of similarly colored e-girl make-up. She waves to her fan section, as she continues skipping down. Crowd:
Now we have GiGi down to the ring, in terms of physically matching up, certainly an underdog with being shorter and especially lighter than everyone else here. But with here craftyness, and a rabid as hell fanbase inspiring her on, whether as a genuine good feeling of having people who like you or just knowing if u win they’ll give you even more
money is the thing about that that would inspire her….up to speculation. And of course, even if they won’t sweep after last match, she can walk out of here with Simp Squad carrying both of our singles titles! Woodbridge:
And Pais! Think about the exposure she’d bring to the brand as our top champ! She’d bring in even more fans than she already has, and that’s not only more money for her, that’s more tickets and merch sold, so that’s more money for all of us here! And my local breweries have all been raising their prices recently so I could damn well use a raise! So even with her questionable tactics, I would not mind her winning one bit!
GiGi reaches where her fan section in the crowd, pulls out her phone, and smiles wide to take a selfie with all of them! All her fans screaming in varying mixes of admiration and horniness. As GiGi continues to skip down to the ring, with as soon as her face is turned away from her fan section, her smile drops to show a brief expression of disgust, before cracking a smile again once she has to turn around once more. She reaches the ring, taking out her phone again to take selfies with the whole crowd in the background, as we see a glimpse of her posting the photos with the caption “Bout to win a championship for all you sweeties! <3” The strings of Repent by Shaggy sound out through the venue
signaling the arrival of Ikbal Rizwan from behind the curtain. Feeling out the rhythm of his entrance music for a momen, before turning his head up, and focusing on the ring ahead of him, the people in it, and the task ahead of him. Crowd:
Out steps out our first former holder of a world title level belt, with the former QWF Champion out onto the stage. Losing it a few months back in the match where it unified with the title he’s going for tonight. And this could be a major moment for him, not only for glory, to show he can rebound, but to show anyone who doubts how hard that QWF title was to win and hold that he truly is on that level.
Rizwan takes a deep breath, as he marches down to the ring. Slapping hands with some fans along the way, but not actually taking his eyes off the ring, as he reaches the apron, steps on then steps in, as he awaits the remaining competitors. Nitroglycerin by CrazyEightyEight
pumps throughout the arena, as Joey McCarty walks out from behind the curtain, looking down, hitting himself on the head a few times, before taking a deep breath, lifting his head up, and stares intently at the ring as he makes his way there Crowd:
Our second former world champ onto the stage, and our first former holder of the title belt he’s gunning for tonight. And I gotta say, a betting man may put it all on Joey tonight. He specializes in captializing on chaotic bullshit, and when you got a 6 person free for all match? There’s more than plenty of opportunities to steal the win right from under someone’s nose. Paisner:
Plus, some extra motivation, he and the rest of the cardinals had allied with Scott before his visa issues, so he’s got a chance to hold down the fort for The Vanguard until Scott sorts out his travel issues. Which could be extra pressure as well, but Joey isn’t one to break under it.
McCarty makes his way to the ring, ignoring the jeers thrown his way, as he enters the ring, finds one corner still free, burying his head on the turnbuckle, before hopping up onto the middle buckle and letting out a pumped “LETS GO!” Before jumping off, looking very ready for what’s up ahead. MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY MONEY
buzzes through the venue, as we see one remarkably confident man step out from behind the curtain. Big Money Maverick with the world’s smuggest smile on his face, clad in his usual dollar bill pattern/dark green designed gear, but with one twist, lines of gold across said gear. Paisner:
Now comes a man with all the confidence in the world, but one may wonder with a recent loss to Mark Dutch, and the shadow of Brendan Byrne seemingly behind his back, is how genuine is this? Is there any facade being put up to mask recent troubles? Woodbridge:
Perhaps a bit, but still, this is our longest reigning world champion ever. And he did all of that clean, now combine that natural skill with a willingness to play dirty? There’s more than plenty reason to always be at least somewhat genuinely confident in your skill and ability to show up in these big moments and walk out with the prize.
Maverick soaks in the boos as he makes his way to the ring, cockily jawing with fans, and proudly boasting his confidence in a wing tonight. He makes it down to the ring, rolls in, as he heads to the center, making a “Making It Rain” hand gesture to the jeering crowd, as we await our final man.. Paisner:
Alright, our final competitor, we’ve know who’s coming for everyone else, but this last competitor’s name went unlisted. Who will be the 6th wrestler with a shot at glory tonigh- YOU’RE GOING HOME IN A FUCKING AMBULANCE! Crowd:
We take a look in the ring, where we see Maverick in particular’s face go from smug confidence right into a mix of shock and fear, as we see the man emerge from behind the curtain, Brendan Byrne coming out onto the entranceway. With a patched leather jacket gone through much wear and tear, with a just as beaten up white t-shirt underneath. A solid block, rather stompy pair of boots, and one more thing, a pipe in hand. Paisner:
AND THE 6TH MAN IS BRENDAN BYRNE! MAKING HIS FIRST IN-RING APPEARANCE SINCE LOSING THE TITLE! AND THE MAN WHO COST HIM THAT TITLE WHO HE’S BEEN THREATENING FROM THE SHADOWS SINCE DOES NOT SEEM PLEASED IN THE SLIGHTEST!
We see everyone else in the ring grow a new certain kind of determined intensity on their faces knowing another former world champ is in the match, while we see Mav’s initial shock and fear turn to anger at Byrne’s presence, as Byrne rushes down to the ring! Only stopping for a moment to set down his pipe, before sliding into the ring, and stareing Maverick right in the eyes. As Javier readies his announcements. Javier:
Introducing first, from Moab, Utah. Weighing in at 210 pounds, this is DAN SMITH! Crowd:
Smith waves to the crowd with a wide smile on his face, looking pumped for this opportunity, as Javier continues on. Javier:
Introducing next, from Montreal, Quebec, Canada. Weighing in at 120 pounds, and sponsored by Monster Energy Drinks, here is GIGI! Crowd:
GiGi goes over to look at her fan section, and blows a kiss to all of them, as Javier continues to go. Javier:
And introducing next, from Islamabad, Pakistan, weighing in at 310 pounds, he is a former QWF Champion, IKBAL RIZWAN! Crowd:
Rizwan gives an appreciative salute to the crowd, as the announcements continue. Javier:
And next up, from Woodstock, Ontario, Canada. Weighing in at 232 pounds, he is a former WiR Tag Team Champion, former WiR World Champion, JOEY. MCCARTY! Crowd:
Joey sounds out the crowd noise, as he bounces around, looking impatient to get going. Javier:
And the next announcement. From Dallas, Texas, weighing in at 225 pounds, he is a former WiR Independent and WiR World Champion, BIG! MONEY! MAVERICK! Crowd:
Maverick stares back at Byrne, a frustration palpable in his eyes, as Javier goes to wrap up the announcements. Javier:
And our final competitor. From London, England. Weighing in at 225 pounds. He is the winner of AMUDOV IV, and a former WiR World Champion, BRENDAN. BYYYYRNNNEEEE! Crowd:
Byrne keeps his gaze locked solidly on Maverick, intensity oozing off of him, as we then hear Wong call for the bell! DING DING DING
There’s a moment of tension as all six men stand in the ring, waiting for someone else to make the first move. This moment is brief, however, because Byrne, noticing nobody else has moved yet, charges across the ring and punches Maverick square in the jaw! Mav stumbles back, as the sea of wrestlers parts a bit, and Byrne follows up, pushing Mav into the ropes and then taking him over with a clothesline! Crowd:
Byrne’s starting off aggressive here, taking Maverick out of the ring , focusing on who he thinks
might be his biggest threat! Woodbridge:
Byrne’s calculated, sure, Allen, but I think this is just good old-fashioned hatred.
Meanwhile in the ring, the other four men face each other, before Dan Smith charges at Ikbal with a flying forearm! Ikbal steps out of the way, but GiGi sees a moment of opportunity and steps forward, catching Ikbal’s exposed arm and tossing him to the mat with an uchi mata
GiGi with a HUGE throw on Ikbal there, taking advantage of his distraction. Woodbridge:
You know, GiGi has to pick spots like that to have a chance in this match, as the least physically intimidating wrestler, but she’s definitely got some dangerous throws here.
Gigi keeps the arm hooked, and drops a knee on it, before transitioning into mat wrestling. Smith hits the ropes and comes back, looking for a target, but Joey is nowhere to be seen, presumably having powdered out of the ring. Gigi tries for an ASMR armbar, but Ikbal is faster than that, and rolls out of danger and quickly back up to vertical, before tossing Gigi with an armdrag! Paisner:
Normally I’d question going for a finishing move this quickly, but in the chaos of a 6 man scramble, it’s a good idea to try for a quick win, and play defense from then on!
On the outside of the ring, Byrne and Maverick are trading punches back and forth. Maverick shoves Byrne to the ground, getting a moment of separation, and tries to scan the ring, but Byrne is immediately back up, and this time catches Maverick with a huge kick to the gut! Woodbridge:
Byrne, on the other hand, has opted for the “beat up someone and then move on” strategy.
Mav doubles over, and Byrne catches him in the side of the head with a mean roundhouse! Crowd:
In the ring, Smith catches Ikbal with a dropkick immediately after the arm drag, and Gigi rolls back to her feet, only to get caught with a second Mormon dropkick! Smith is fired up, and as Ikbal stands up, he goes for the exclamation point, springboarding off the ropes for a flying forearm - NO! Ikbal steps into him and powers Smith halfway across the ring with a belly-to-belly! Crowd:
What a suplex!
Smith skids along the mat, holding his back, and GiGi sees her chance to go for a quick backslide! 1! 2!
Rizwan kicks out at 2!
Byrne isn’t finished with Maverick on the outside, absolutely laying into him with a hail of punches! Mav fights back to one knee, then catches Byrne with a single punch - one right to the dick - before rolling back into the ring and to relative safety! Crowd:
Byrne collapses to the mat, and Maverick goes straight for Ikbal with a swinging neckbreaker! Ikbal hits the mat, Gigi catches Maverick with a headscissors, and blows a kiss to the adoring fans watching on stream - Paisner:
Gigi with an early advantage - if you can call it that this early in the contest!
Maverick is definitely feeling the effects of Byrne’s assault, and he’s slow to get up. Gigi struts to the ropes, showing off for the crowd - Crowd:
But doesn’t see Joey McCarty slithering into the ring! Joey with a quick roll-up! 1! 2!
Gigi tries to kick out, but Joey firmly plants his feet on the ropes! 3! DING Paisner:
JOEY WITH THE FIRST FALL! Javier:
And your current interim champion, at a time of 1:14 - JOEY MCCARTY!
Gigi gets up, absolutely livid that her moment was ruined, but Joey’s already back out of the ring! He takes a moment to stomp on Byrne, who is still holding his crotch, then keeps his distance. Woodbridge:
See, Joey’s not at all worried about the flow of this match any longer - he picked his moment, and now all he’s doing is playing defense for the next 23 or so minutes.
Ikbal is up to vertical first, and GiGi plants, before running forward with a spinning heel kick! Ikbal is aware, though, and ducks the kick, before running off the ropes! Paisner:
GiGi looking for another big shot with that Vine kick - 6 seconds is all she needs after all. Woodbridge:
... phrasing, Paisner.
GiGi lands on her feet, but catches a clothesline to the back of the head from Maverick, who is in turn absolutely steamrolled by 300 pounds of Pakistani crossbody! Rizwan hooks the leg! 1! 2!
McCarty is into the ring to break the count, and immediately starts working on Rizwan, laying an impressive series of punches into the back of his head! Rizwan goes flat to the mat, but Joey keeps on laying into him with punches! Crowd:
Yeah, sure, but it’s good logic. Joey doesn’t want anyone standing up, because if someone’s standing up they can go for a quick pinfall! Paisner:
Good logic doesn’t mean the fans are going to agree - look!
Dan Smith gets to his feet, and notices Joey on one knee, before a smile crosses his face. He charges forward, leaps into the air, and catches Joey with an absolutely DEVASTATING curb stomp! Crowd:
Smith starts to go for the cover, but Gigi has gotten up and stops him with a quick thrust kick, sending Smith to the mat and going for the cover herself, placing one foot on Joey’s chest and pulling a phone out of her tights to get a perfect selfie angle! 1! 2! 3-NO!
Joey manages to roll a shoulder up, but is obviously not anywhere near cognizant of his surroundings as he continues rolling his way out of the ring! GiGi, on the other hand, is ready for Smith to get up and this time levels him with another spinning heel kick! Paisner:
OOH! Dead video site, but that kick might have killed Dan Smith! Crowd:
YAAAAY!/BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! That One Guy:
STEP ON MEEEEEE!
Smith hits the mat hard, and GiGi gets to her feet - only to be caught by Maverick from beind! Mav whirls her around, but GiGi is prepared, and turns Maverick’s attempt to hit a Chainsaw Massacre into a Northern Lights Suplex! 1! 2!
Maverick kicks out, and rolls to his feet! Woodbridge:
GiGi is taking control of this contest so far, and with Joey unconscious on the outside, this is the best chance to take a quick fall. Paisner:
Sure, but Maverick isn’t going to go down easy, that’s for sure!
GiGi is able to keep Maverick off balance with a series of quick strikes! Maverick staggers back after a quick solebutt, and GiGi goes to the ropes, going for a springboard - NO! GiGi eats a huge fucking roundhouse kick from Brendan Byrne as she leaps for a springboard, and craters back down to the mat! Crowd:
Maverick is not pleased
by this turn of events, and starts stepping backwards, but Byrne’s not having any of it, and hops over the top rope to confront Maverick! Maverick goes for a huge haymaker right hand, but Byrne takes it right on the chin, barely flinching before knocking Mav back into the ropes with a huge side kick! Paisner:
Byrne is back in action, and he’s not going to stop for anything!
Byrne takes a crow hop forward, plants, and sends Maverick toppling over the top rope with a stiff-sounding roundhouse kick! Crowd:
As Ikbal starts to stand, Byrne is measuring, and he hops over the top rope, before flipping onto Maverick’s prone body with a beautiful Asai Moonsault! Crowd:
HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! Paisner:
Byrne crashing from 10 feet into the air right onto Maverick to take him out of the match!
Rizwan looks around, before lighting on the slightly stirring Dan Smith! Rizwan pulls Smith from the ground smoothly into a vertical suplex position, before planting and POWERING Smith down with a chokeslam! Crowd:
Rizwan falls directly into a cover! 1! 2!
NO! Joey’s here, he’s angry, and he’s not going to let Ikbal steal his title! He pulls the referee out of the ring, then rolls into the ring himself. This time, though, Rizwan is ready, and breaks the pin to catch Joey with a fireman’s carry! Javier:
There are 15 minutes remaining in this contest! Paisner:
Rizwan with some technical trickery, but Joey’s got the fall advantage, and you know he’s not Joey hits the mat, and Rizwan immediately transitions into a chokehold! Joey struggles free, but Rizwan is one step ahead and plants Joey back down to the mat with a huge chop! Joey hits the mat, and Rizwan is quick to transition to a headscissors submission! Joey has trouble getting free from the mountainous thighs of Rizwan, and Rizwan puts his entire focus on choking Joey out!
This turns out to be a bad move, as GiGi stirs, pulls herself to the corner, and lands back-first across both opponents with a gorgeous Swanton Bomb! Paisner:
360 NOSCOPE! Woodbridge:
Of course there’s no scope, it’s a dive! Paisner:
No, Mark - it’s a gamer thing - Woodbridge:
And it ain’t even a 360 either. grumbles
Rizwan rolls away, clutching his knees in pain, and GiGi goes for a cover on Joey! 1! 2! 3! DING Javier:
Your NEW Current Interim Champion, at a time of 11:21 - GIGI!
On the outside of the ring, heedless of the chaos happening inside the ring, Byrne gets up, hobbling slightly as his knee seems to have been tweaked from that moonsault, but with the intensity of a man possessed. He hauls Maverick up to vertical, and THROWS him into the steel steps! Maverick crashes through the metal limply, but Byrne isn’t finished! Right by the steel steps, Byrne spies his pipe, and an evil smile crosses his face. Paisner:
GiGi with the pinfall! She’s in a great position to win this match as half the participants are entirely incapacitated! Woodbridge:
And Byrne is going after Maverick with what looks like surgical fury - I don’t think I’ve seen him this vicious in a long time!
GiGi is distracted on the inside of the ring by a slowly rising Dan Smith, and she tries to get rid of him quickly with a quick superkick, but Smith ducks! Smith transitions into a back suplex hold, which GiGi kicks out of quickly! Paisner:
GiGi hasn’t taken much punishment in this match so far, unlike almost everyone else - Smith knows this and he’s trying to wrestle a more measured pace. Woodbridge:
It might be a better idea to just take his shot now, though - don’t let GiGi take control back!
On the outside of the ring, Byrne has hobbled over to his pipe, and stands over a prone, somewhat lifeless Maverick, raising it high into the air! Crowd:
FUCK HIM UP, BRENDAN, FUCK HIM UP! clap clap
There’s a moment where Byrne raises the pipe high up into the air, ready to bring it down onto Maverick’s skull - Paisner:
Byrne - come on - don’t do this, that’s legitimately murder!
A bit of doubt flashes across his face, and he repositions. The pipe still comes down with all the fury of an executioner, but this time the target is Maverick’s right knee! Maverick howls in pain as the pipe impacts onto his knee, and he rolls away, clutching his knee in agony! Woodbridge:
Oh god! Byrne’s proven adept with that steel pipe, and that shot could have broken Maverick’s leg! Sure - it’s justified - but my god Byrne is giving into violence here!
Byrne follows, raising the pipe again and bringing it down on the back of Maverick’s right leg! We cut to inside the ring - Smith is up before GiGi, and he sees this happening on the outside. With no hesitation, Smith charges, hopping up to the top rope, and leaping off with a gorgeous plancha onto a distracted Byrne! Byrne topples to the mat, his knee buckling yet again, and Smith is almost immediately back up, fired up! Crowd:
This match has devolved into utter chaos! Rizwan is just beginning to stir, Joey’s down, Byrne’s down, Maverick might be permanently
down - it’s Gigi and Smith right now!
GiGi gets a run-up for a dive onto Smith, but he’s a step faster, having done this for his entire career! He leaps onto the apron and catches the diving GiGi with an enzuigiri, sending her ricocheting back into the ring for a second time tonight! Woodbridge:
GiGi has gone high risk twice this match - both times she’s gotten kicked in the head. Something to keep in mind for the next time around! Javier:
There are 10 minutes remaining in this contest!
GiGi hits the mat hard, and Smith sees his opportunity! He pulls himself onto the apron, and clambers to the top rope. At this point the adrenaline is obviously wearing off, and you can see the pain each motion brings him, but he makes it to the top rope, and takes flight, crashing down onto GiGi’s prone form with a beautiful leg drop! Paisner:
COUGAR SUPREME! DAN SMITH COULD BE OUR NEXT WORLD CHAMP!
Smith bounces off GiGi, and clutches his back in pain, but stifles it for long enough to hook a leg! 1! 2! 3!
submitted by youto2
to wrestlingisreddit [link] [comments]
2020.10.17 19:21 Nyanrlathotep Hour 32.. and I’m feeling good!
Well, at least, I’m not feeling too bad. Listening to the Woodstock album, thinking about my next live show on Halloween weekend with my friends. This will be my first time seeing my friends in over a year, yep. All the excuses I made to not see them.. all the hate I developed towards people for absolutely no reason.. it’s all fading away. I feel so happy and loving again. My body hurts, but my heart and mind is full of happiness!!
I feel so much more love and compassion for people. I miss volunteering at the nursing homes. I miss helping people and helping around my house. I’ve been laying in bed, full of anxiety, drinking kratom for far too long.
You can all do this! ❤️ my inbox is always open to anyone who needs someone to talk to.
Edit to add my reasons for quitting.
To be a better more stable mother who doesn’t have to chug a cup of green sludge before I pick her up.
To help my body flourish and be its natural best self
To stop my psoriasis... kratom brings it out in me, somehow.
To fix my bathroom problems.
To stop my nightly panic attacks.
To be a better partner, friend, and overall better person.
To enjoy music and hobbies again.
To be a compassionate human being who can make a difference in the world.
submitted by Nyanrlathotep
to quittingkratom [link] [comments]
2020.10.14 11:04 walklineua Unilend Finance - Listing Soon, Moonshot Expected
Hi friends, i want to tell you about UniLend project which will be listed soon.
First of all i want to tell you, Unilend team announced that CertiK has audited UFT smart contract.
The blockchain security pioneer is one of the most advanced auditors in whole-chain, smart contracts, and VAPT verification in the scene.
Certik's best-in-class cybersecurity experts have delivered end-to-end security audits for over 220 clients, including over 118k lines of code, and now UFT smart contracts as well.
Here is the announcement by the CertiK
UniLend is a permission-less decentralized protocol that combines spot trading services and money markets with lending and borrowing services through smart contracts. UniLend Features
Any ERC20 token will be able to list without any entity controlling the listing process, making UniLend’s features accessible to every token.
*Lending & borrowing:
Users have the capability to unlock their token’s functionality for lending to receive an interest rate and for borrowing by paying an interest rate.
A corresponding trading pair will also operate on UniLend's platform to include decentralized spot trading functionality for platform users.
The protocol will be governed by its token holders through proposals in order to ensure adjustments to the protocol are made with a majority consensus.
By providing liquidity for asset trading and loans on Unilend's platform, users are able to receive fees in proportion to their liquidity pool stake.
*Native Utility Token:
The native utility token of UniLend will be UFT, Unilend Finance Token. The token will have multiple use cases for governance, platform utility, and much more. How is UniLend different to existing DeFi protocols?
Existing DeFi solutions have left the majority of digital assets outside of the DeFi ecosystem. There are over 6000 tokens listed on coinmarketcap. However, the current platforms such as Compound, Aave, Maker DAO, and many more, support less than 30 assets.Some protocols offer lending and borrowing with a limited set of tokens while others offer the freedom to trade any ERC20 assets but neglect the lending and borrowing aspect.
UniLend is bridging that gap by combining the decentralization aspect of enabling any ERC20 to be utilized as collateral for lending & borrowing whilst providing the flexibility for users to also trade their assets in-platform. Ultimately, UniLend aims to unlock the full potential of digital assets for their owners. Investors
UniLend Successfully Raises $3.1M in Seed and Private Sale Rounds Amid Overwhelming Strategic Investor Support
Unilend funding rounds attracted the attention of some of the industry’s heaviest hitters, including Woodstock Fund, Signal Ventures, 3Commas, Danish Chaudhry (Head of Bitcoin
Exchange), Jay Putera (Partner at CryptoBriefing
), TRG Capital, BTC12 Capital, AU21 Capital, Youbi Capital, TomoChain, Bidesk, Bibox, Tenzor Capital, and Sandeep Nailwal (Co-founder of Matic Network). Tokenomics
*Initial Circulating Supply:
*Seed Round Price:
$0,07 (25% released after 6 months, 25% after 12 months, 25% after 15 months and 25% after 18 months)
*Seed Round Hardcap
: $700,000 (reached)
*Private Round Price:
$0,12 (25% release at TGE, 25% after 3 months, 25% after 6 months and 25% after 9 months)
*Private Round Hardcap:
Interest form is cloesed,lottery done with partneeship Chainlink VFR, KYC process ongoing. (Hardcap: $150,000, oversubscription)
There will be a voting for Bithumb Global Listing on October 15th - 12:00 to 16:59 (UTC+8) Conclusion
UniLend protocol is working to create a new niche in the market which has been neglected and untapped by current solutions in the DeFi space. I believe team efforts will create a level playing field in the market by enabling every token to be a part of the growing DeFi ecosystem.
submitted by walklineua
to CryptoMoonShots [link] [comments]
2020.10.13 21:49 Doctor_Underdunk Life in the Upper Valley?
I've been lurking on this sub for a bit, and I know there's not much encouragement for moving to VT right now, buuuut....
My partner has a very exciting job opportunity at Dartmouth. I am a full-time remote worker (data scientist). I lived in Montreal for some time, so I think I am prepared for the weather, but I'm willing to listen if you think I'm wrong.
Can anyone share their experiences with ECFiber? I'm particularly looking for fast and reliable upload speeds, and VTel (where it has a fiber network) appears to have a problematically low data cap for me.
The schools in Norwich and Woodstock look to be the standouts of this region. Are there other areas with excellent schools that I have overlooked?
I have no experience with either oil heating or well/septic homes. Are these substantial maintenance concerns, or just periodic chores?
I'm open to any other words of wisdom you're willing to share. We know how much we don't know about the region! As you can imagine, the prospect of moving during COVID is fairly intimidating.
Thanks in advance, everyone.
submitted by Doctor_Underdunk
to vermont [link] [comments]
2020.10.13 21:30 MikeJesus My father built robots in the 80s
‘I have a surprise for you Jimbo!’ My father, the inventor in plaid, stood in the middle of the living room with a blocky object hidden beneath a bed-sheet. It was the spring of 1981, my mother and me had just come back from the park.
‘What is it?’ I asked.
‘Guess!’ His hands tightened over the cloth. Whatever the surprise was, he was excited to reveal it.
A gentle whirr and a beep came from beneath the bed-sheet. A skeptical smile spread across my mother’s face. ‘Brian, you didn’t build a-‘
‘Ah! Don’t spoil it!’ he cut her off, ‘Let him guess! Come on Jimbo, what do you think the surprise is?’
The mysterious object let out a series of beeps. Weight shifted beneath the bed-sheet. I didn’t have the faintest idea of what it could be, but I also knew my father well enough to know he wouldn’t move on unless I made a guess. ‘A washing machine?’ I guessed.
They both laughed. Over the following years my guess would be carved into family history through funny dinner party anecdotes.
‘It’s not a washing machine Jimbo,’ my father finally said, ‘it’s something much better than a washing machine.’
‘You didn’t actually build it
, did you?’ My mother asked, in amused disbelief.
‘Hun, if you didn’t want a husband who builds things you shouldn’t have married an inventor,’ he said with pride in his voice and then turned to me. ‘Jimbo, let me introduce you to your new friend – Zorbo!’
He ripped off the cloth covering the bulky thing in our living room.
A pair of flash light eyes stared back at me from a rectangular metal skull. Knobs and dials stuck out of the robot’s stainless steel chest like medals from some intergalactic war. Its arms hung on tubing that seemed to have come straight from a vacuum cleaner, but its hands were made up of sleek shapes that suggested top-secret military technology.
‘HELLO FRIEND, I AM ZORBO,’ the robot said, its voice strained through lifeless circuitry, ‘WOULD YOU LIKE TO PLAY CATCH WITH ME?’
I was an only child, and by extension, a lonely child. For years I had begged my parents for a younger brother or sister, but the medication that my mother was taking made the idea of another pregnancy far too dangerous. That winter I shifted my pleas for company over to a puppy, and my parents obliged, but within three hours of finding my new friend beneath the Christmas tree I ended up in the emergency room. Turns out that I am deathly allergic to dogs.
With his son unable to find companionship, my father attempted to help the only way he knew how – by inventing me a friend.
The heap of sentient metal terrified me, there was something about the sluggish way that Zorbo’s eyes scanned the room that made me feel quintessentially unsafe, but I knew that if I rejected my father’s gift I would break the man’s heart. After the initial fear of the robot passed, our little family went outside and played catch with Zorbo.
Soon enough word about Zorbo got around the neighborhood. You could have made a 80s sitcom about us, we were the family living in suburbia with a zany robot. Except Zorbo wasn’t very zany.
At first he was the equivalent of a particularly friendly Roomba who could throw around a baseball, but as time went on, and as my mother got sicker, Zorbo’s skillset expanded. Every night, as I lay awake, terrified of the lifeless machine that lived with us, I could see the lights of my father’s workshop burning in the darkness of our backyard. Within months Zorbo could cook and clean and mow the lawn. Every chore that the robot was able to do gave my mother more time to rest and gave my father and me more time to spend with her. But that time was limited.
As she lay on that hospital bed, getting out the few final words that her disease riddled body could muster, Zorbo was there. As me and my father wept and assured my mother that she lived a truly beautiful life, the robot stood in the corner of the room, his flashlight eyes scanning his surroundings. He listened to her last words. He internalized them deep into his circuitry.
For a year the house was a place of inescapable sadness. Every room, every dish, every tiny bit of existence reminded us of the woman who was whisked away by a clump of rouge cells. Even though we were in a state of deep mourning, the house was immaculate and our stomachs were full. As we tried to make sense of the new world we were living in, Zorbo the robot was there to take care of us.
The memory of my mother never faded, decades later a day seldom goes by when I don’t think of her, but as time passed, the daily soul shattering sadness turned into quiet melancholy. Life carried on, my father went back to work for the military, I started grade school, people moved in and out of the neighborhood and eventually the life we once lived as a family became a memory. The only thing that remained constant was Zorbo. He was always there, making sure we were comfortable, serving us and providing an emotional crutch when needed.
That all changed in the summer of 1989 — the summer of the lawnmower.
Cindy, the daughter of our new neighbor across the street, was sitting with me at the living room table outlining a five-paragraph essay on the effects of the 1968 invasion of Czechoslovakia. I was trying to do the same, but my hormone addled mind refused to think about Soviet tanks or the crushing of democracy. All I could think about was Cindy. It was the last week of school and I was hopelessly in love.
‘Hey, how do you spell Brezhnev? All of these Soviet names give me a headache,’ she asked, leaning over to my near empty paper. I tried to spell out the name, but the angelic smell of her conditioner made it difficult to concentrate.
‘Zorbo,’ I finally said, giving up on impressing Cindy with my spelling skills, ‘How do you spell Brezhnev?’
‘THANK YOU FOR ASKING, FRIEND.’ The robot’s flashlight eyes spun around in a half circle before he gave his reply. ‘LEONID BREZHNEV, LEADER OF THE SOVIET UNION BETWEEN 1964 AND 1982. L-E-O-N-I-D. B-R-E-Z-H-N-E-V.’
‘Thank you Zorbo!’ Cindy said.
‘YOU ARE WELCOME, FRIEND,’ Zorbo replied. ‘WOULD YOU LIKE MORE SPELLING HELP?’
‘No thank you Zorbo,’ I mumbled. Cindy thought the robot was really neat
, and even though my metal house guest still made me uncomfortable I was starting to embrace the benefits of having a sentient machine full of knowledge whirring around the house.
‘Don’t talk too much about the Soviets with Zorbo kids, things might get personal,’ my father said, emerging from the kitchen with a sandwich so precisely cut that it could have only come from a machine. ‘He’s part Russian. I mean most of his circuitry is Japanese, but our metal friend here might still get a bit offended if you don’t tow the Kremlin political line.’
Cindy’s laugh was like a symphony of angels enjoying a wholesome joke. ‘I’ll be sure to keep the politburo in mind when talking to Zorbo, Mr. Carpek,’ she said.
‘Poltiburo, eh?’ my father was impressed, ‘Smart one right here Jimbo. Hold onto her, she can teach you a thing or two.’
I wanted to hold on to her, oh God how I wanted to hold on to her, I wanted to surrender myself to the teen Goddess and scream my undying love for Cindy through my crackling voice chords – but instead I just blushed. My father stifled a grin and changed the topic.
‘By the way, Cindy, send your pops my regards about the new lawn mower. Beauty of a machine he’s got there. If we didn’t have Zorbo here cutting our grass I’d be hounding him for the name of the salesman.’ My father gave Zorbo a friendly pat on his tubular arm and then turned to me, ‘Seen the neighbor’s lawnmower yet Jimbo?’
I shook my head.
‘She’s a beaut!’ He kissed the tips of his fingers like the Italian chefs on TV.
‘I’ll pass on the compliments, Mr. Carpek,’ Cindy said, smiling a smile that could turn Tiananmen Square into Woodstock, ‘I’ll actually do so now, essay is just about done. Thanks for the spelling help Zorbo!’
‘YOU ARE WELCOME, FRIEND.’
I left my unfinished essay behind and followed Cindy to the edge of my front lawn. I had hoped that at some point during the thirty-second walk a burst of bravery would manifest in my chest and I would tell her how I felt. But it didn’t. It never did. I just stood behind our white picket fence watching my one true love skip across the street.
‘Hey Jim!’ Cindy’s dad yelled as he mowed his lawn, ‘Say Hi to your old man for me, will ya?’
‘Sure thing Mr. Clarke!’ I yelled back, ‘Also, my dad sends his compliments about your lawn mower!’
Mr. Clarke’s old machine was a rustling gas-guzzling beast. Whenever his lawn was getting a trim the entire neighborhood would be alerted to the grounds keeping with a jagged metallic screech, but that was no longer the case. The new lawn mower was a tool of sleek metallic shapes and blinking lights that let out nothing but a soft hum as it cut through the grass.
‘Thanks Jim! She’s a beaut, ain’t she?’ Cindy’s dad said before returning to the mowing. I never inherited the fascination with machines that my father had, but watching that machine work away at the greenery I couldn’t help but recognize a hint of hypnotizing aesthetics. Looking at the calculated metallic body of the machine made me feel like I was living in the 21st century, the future had arrived in suburbia.
‘HELLO FRIEND,’ an inhuman voice next to me said, ‘WHAT IS THAT?’
‘That’s a uh, lawnmower,’ I replied, uncomfortable at the idea of how quietly Zorbo could move when he wanted to.
‘LAWN MOWER,’ Zorbo said with an unusual softness in his jagged speech, ‘BEAUTIFUL LAWN MOWER.’
‘Yeah,’ I said, ‘Beautiful lawn mower.’
My father seldom cooked, but when he did he would deliver a symphony of spices that would make you eat yourself into a food coma. Even Zorbo, with all of his circuitry and mechanical precision, couldn’t replicate the mouth-watering flavor of my father’s Bolognese.
Yet as delicious as dinner was that night, I couldn’t bring myself to enjoy the spaghetti. Instead of letting my mind drift away on the gentle notes of paprika I was tied down to reality by my frustrated teenage heart.
‘So,’ he said, ‘Is Cindy seeing someone?’
‘No,’ I replied, ‘Don’t think so at least.’
He swallowed another forkful of pasta, and then, with his mouth still full, as if it was a matter of no importance, he asked the question that had been festering in the back of my head for the past three months. ‘You gonna ask her out?’
The butterflies in my stomach informed me that I wouldn’t be eating any more that night. ‘I don’t know,’ I said, ‘I’m scared she’ll say no.’
‘It doesn’t matter Jimbo, you’re fourteen,’ my father told me, ‘If she says No
you won’t remember it in a couple of years. What you will remember forever is not asking.’
I was a teen; my perception of time barely reached past the end of summer break, yet for a split second I imagined myself at forty, my hairline thinning like my dad’s, eating spaghetti with a child of my own.
‘But I’m nervous, what if she says no?’ I finally asked.
‘You’ll survive,’ he said, ‘I was nervous when I first asked out your mom, and it worked out fine.’
He smiled as he said it, but as soon as he mentioned her, his eyes dimmed. It had been years since she had passed, but certain memories stay as sharp as the day that they were forged. We were sitting in the living room, eating spicy spaghetti, but really we were both back in that hospital room, sitting by the frail body of the woman who was once made my father nervous.
‘Where’s Zorbo?’ He brought the conversation back to reality. ‘Zorbo? Where are you?’
At dinnertime Zorbo would usually be in the kitchen, quietly whirring to himself, waiting for dishes to wash up. But that night the robot wasn’t anywhere to be found. We searched all across the house but our electric servant was gone. It wasn’t until a chance glance out of the window that I saw him.
The moon softly reflected off his metallic body. His flashlight eyes hovered beams of red into the night. Zorbo was staring at Cindy’s house.
‘BEAUTIFUL LAWN MOWER,’ his voice was different, it was as if a roughness had been chipped away, as if somewhere within his wiry viscera a hint of emotion existed. ‘BEAUTIFUL LAWN MOWER!’ There was a trace of longing in his voice.
‘Huh,’ my father said, ‘Looks like someone’s blown a fuse. Come here Zorbo, we’ll take you to the garage and figure out what’s up.’ But the robot refused to budge. It wasn’t until my father pulled his tube arms towards the workshop that Zorbo relented and started to move. But even as Zorbo’s blinking body moved away from the street his head remained turned. Those flashlights through which he took in the outside world were aimed straight at Cindy’s house.
‘LOVE IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS,’ Zorbo said. My father froze. That gentle note of humanity in Zorbo’s voice sent a bolt of discomfort through my spine. We recognized those words.
‘BEAUTIFUL LAWN MOWER’ Zorbo said again, his artificiality returning.
My father’s face slowly regained its smile. ‘Beautiful lawnmower indeed buddy, let’s get your circuitry checked out.’
There was enough pain medication in her to tare away most of her personality but somewhere in that bony woman there was a semblance of my mother. We sat with her for the last two days of her life, trying to say all the things we would regret not saying and assuring her of what a beautiful life she had lived. Whenever she would sleep I would go make my acquaintance with the soda machine and stroll around the hospital looking for people who had it worse than me. My father talked extensively to whoever would listen about the machines his wife was hooked up to.
Zorbo stood still in the back of the room. He never moved an inch until the hour when she died. It was as if he could tell that the life was seeping out of her, as if the machines that were keeping her alive had told him that she was moving on. As we listened to my mother’s final attempts at speaking Zorbo slid behind us. We stood vigil as a family.
“Love is the only thing that matters,” she said. Zorbo softly whirred next to us as she died.
That night I sat with the memories and tried to make sense of everything. I saw my mom again, I felt that heat in my chest when I thought about Cindy, I could imagine myself as a regretful balding forty-year-old. Love is all that matters
. Outside, my father tinkered away in the garage, trying to wipe Zorbo’s circuits of the notion of love, but in my bedroom a fire of teenage passion was burning. I fell asleep trying to compose a monologue that would make Cindy swoon.
‘Hey, were we meant to write a summary of the chapter or just until page 48?’ she asked. I had no idea what she was talking about, all I knew was that we were sitting in our living room and I was about to tell her.
‘I really like you,’ I blurted out. ‘Like, as a person, Cindy, I think you’re pretty cool. But also, I like you as, like, a romantic partner? Like, I think you’re cute and I think about you all the time. I like you. I’m sorry.’
It came out of me like a rushing waterfall, but my face felt like it was the surface of the sun. Her confused look turned up the heat.
‘Uhhh…’ Her eyes kept on fluttering, for a split second she looked a bit like Zorbo if you ever asked him what time it was. ‘I uhhh… I’m sorry too? Because… ummm… I like you as a friend. But… Yeah… No.’
I stared down at my textbook. Leonid Brezhnev was glaring at me from the page.
‘I should go,’ she whispered.
‘I’ll walk you out,’ I said, immediately biting into my cheek.
The walk to the edge of my yard couldn’t have taken longer than thirty seconds, but as we quietly made our way out of the house I aged a decade. My mind was wholly consumed by the sting of rejection, the tragedy of it, the unfairness of it. I was a little boy getting an allergic reaction to a Christmas puppy again, but this time instead of a rash on my skin there was a rash on my heart.
I walked past Zorbo without looking at him. From the whirring of his hand blades I presumed that he was just mowing the lawn.
She didn’t say anything. Cindy just walked across the street and past her front door without a single glance back.
Sure, she apologized a week later, and a couple months down the line I was awe struck with someone else, but in that moment, in that searing moment my world was on fire.
‘BEAUTIFUL LAWNMOWER’ Zorbo said.
Soil clung to his metallic body. The blades that extended from his hands tore into the ground, shooting bits of earth sprawling across the sidewalk. He stared across the street with the same longing I had in my soul.
‘LOVE IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS.’
‘Yeah,’ I said, as I shuffled off to my room to mope.
My father found Zorbo shortly before the sun set. He walked out calling to the robot about the dirty dishes that had gathered in the sink, but as soon as my father saw his creation digging into the ground his tone changed. He spoke to him in calm, soothing words. The robot had been working like precise clockwork since the day that he was constructed; my father was worried to see his creation descend into glitch-filled madness.
I knew I should have told him as soon as I found the malfunctioning robot, but there were more pressing things on my mind. As my father rolled Zorbo into his workshop my love for Cindy consumed me. The life we could have had if I had just waited, if I had phrased my confession of love differently; snapshots of an alternate reality burned in my mind like an angry film reel.
The visions in my head grew sharper. I didn’t just get rejected by some teenage girl, I got rejected by my future wife. Images of me proposing, of us having our first child, of me sitting by her hospital bed as she died of old age – they squirmed through my mind accompanied by a booming replay of the couple dozen words with which I wiped them from the future. I was one hundred percent sure I had reached my first life-long regret. I writhed with mental discomfort until I couldn’t be alone. The lights were on in my father’s workshop.
‘Dad?’ I asked, standing in the door.
‘Hey Jimbo, sorry, going to skip dinner tonight, think there should still be some Bolognese in the fridge though,’ he said, not looking away from his work. My father’s workshop was always a mess of disparate electronics and scattered tools, but that night all other projects were cleared away to make room for Zorbo. Our robotic family member lay on a wooden table, his sleek metal skin removed, revealing a chaotic mess of wires and computer chips.
‘Was Zorbo acting any different when you came back home from school?’ he asked while digging out a stack of microchips from behind the robot’s eyes with a screwdriver.
‘Yeah, he, uh, was digging a hole in the front yard.’
‘Alright well,’ my father buried the frustration in his voice with a sigh, ‘Next time you see him doing something weird please tell me, alright Jim? Zorbo’s inner workings are very fragile, if something is wrong it needs to be fixed. I don’t want to lose him to some loose wiring.’
‘Sorry dad,’ I said.
He mumbled something and went back to tinkering with the robot’s skull. I was going to leave him to his work, but the sadness in my chest was far too potent for me to be alone. I knew I needed to talk to someone.
‘So I asked Cindy out…’ As soon as the words left my mouth his hands stopped moving.
I didn’t have to say anything. As soon as he turned around he could tell. Before I knew it I was wrapped up in a bear hug with my eyes growing wet.
‘It’s going to be okay Jimbo, there will be plenty others. Proud of you.’
‘Proud of me?’
‘Of course, you put yourself out there and that’s the most important-‘
‘LOVE IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS’
Wires were hanging off of his raw body, his flashlight eyes spun around the room searching for an exit. Zorbo was getting off of the table and moving towards the door. ‘BEAUTIFUL LAWNMOWER,’ he gargled through a partially dismantled voice box.
‘Zorbo?’ My father let go of me and walked up to the staggering mess of electronics, ‘Where are you going Zorbo?’
‘LOVE IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS,’ Zorbo said, shuffling his way past my father, ‘BEAUTIFUL LAWNMOWER.’
‘Now, now, Zorbo,’ my father said, grabbing Zorbo’s arm slightly above the mud-caked blades, ‘I think you need to lie down for a bit. There’s something wrong with you and-‘
‘BEAUTIFUL LAWNMOWER!’ Zorbo boomed, as he ripped free of my father’s grip. ‘LOVE IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!’ He continued walking out of the garage, each step filled with crackling defiance.
‘Zorbo! You stop right this instant!’ my father yelled in a tone that was only familiar to me from early childhood, ‘If you keep behaving like this I will shut you off.’
The robot’s body froze mid-step. He didn’t turn around, but his head did. ‘YOU WANT TO STOP ZORBO FROM LOVE?’
My father gently pushed me aside, placing me away from the disobedient robot. ‘Zorbo,’ he said, his voice growing cold, ‘Come back here and lie down on the table.’
The beams of light focused in on my father. The wiring of Zorbo’s body twisted and turned until they were face to face. The blades on his hands started to spin. ‘YOU WANT TO STOP ZORBO FROM LOVE,’ his voice lowered in volume, it was almost drowned out by the sharp whirring of the mud covered knives, ‘GOODBYE, FRIEND.’
Zorbo’s tubular arm came down like a karate chop on my father’s shoulder. Hot blood splashed all over my face. Pained screams filled my ears. The blades cut through my father’s skin like butter. I could hear the crackling of bones breaking.
Through my father’s throat-tearing agony I could hear a single word come through. “Run!” He wanted his only child to get away from the manic robot that was sawing at his arm. He wanted me to survive. But I couldn’t move an inch. I just stood there, pressed up against the tool cabinet, watching my father be murdered by a robot.
I could see myself running across the street to Cindy’s house. I could see myself trying to explain to a police officer that an unhinged robot killed my dad. I could see myself standing at my father’s funeral, watching the dirt over his casket solidify my status as an orphan.
But I would never actually see my father’s funeral.
Instead I felt the cold steel of a monkey wrench in my hand. I summoned a battle cry from the depth of my lungs. If I let my father die at the hands of a robot I would regret it for the rest of my life.
The adrenalin coursing through my veins gave reality a jagged edge. Everything moved with neck-breaking speed but each time that the blunt object made contact with Zorbo’s wiry brain time dissolved into a short-lived eternity. Zorbo’s intricately woven mind was reduced into a mess of cables. Soon enough my wrench made contact with the floor of the garage. Zorbo was dead.
Everything after that is a blur.
I remember stumbling out into the street covered in blood, barely able to muster up more strength to yell for help. I remember Mr. Clarke holding down a torn shirt over the geyser of blood that was streaming out of my father’s shoulder. I remember sitting in the back of an ambulance, watching my father linger on the edge of life.
For two days I survived on a diet of pop and chocolate from a familiar vending machine. He lost a lot of blood. Even at fourteen I could sense that the doctors were preparing me for the worst. But, miraculously, on the third day, I was allowed to see my dad.
He was weak, desperately weak, but he was alive. All it cost him was his arm. He spent the entire summer in a state of exhausted shock from his creation turning on him, but by the time the fall leaves filled our yard he was outside with a rake, cracking jokes. By Christmas he had a brand new metallic arm courtesy of his workbench. By New Years he was washing dishes. Mr. Clarke was more than happy to give him the number of the lawn mower salesman.
Life carried on. I graduated high-school, moved out of state for university and then continued moving every couple of years depending on where my job took me. I had my fair share of rejection and break-ups but no heartache ever reached the mythical proportions of the rejection of ’89. With all said and done though, my father was right, knowing that I asked and got shot down was considerably easier to live with than having to wonder what could have been.
I grew into an adult and my father shrunk into an old man. He continued to do work for the army well into old age but as time went on he was phased out by younger minds that were more in touch with modern tech. In retirement my father continued to tinker with electronics and built himself contraptions to help him with the tasks that old age made difficult, but eventually, as tremors set into his human hand and age chipped away at his human brain he stopped coming to his workshop.
I found myself thinking about his funeral again, but this time it wasn’t just a panicked snapshot forced into my head by a frenzied robot servant, this time I knew that somewhere down the line I would be standing in a church trying to summarize what the man meant to me in a speech to his old coworkers and family who I hadn’t seen for years.
But I never did. I never saw my father’s funeral.
The fact that I belong to a whole generation of people who were robbed of a funeral makes the pain sting less. There were plenty of other children of the 80s who lost their parents during the pandemic of ’20 who didn’t have weekly Skype calls with their fathers, who had unresolved issues, who had fallen out of touch. But knowing that I’m not the only one who lost a parent during the corona outbreak only lessens the pain slightly. The thought of him dying alone, feverish, connected to a respirator he could have built in his workshop, still cuts into my heart with fiery force.
By the time I was able to travel back to my hometown the house had been empty for months. I walked through the rooms and wept as the memories washed over me. Even though I was filled with sorrow, there was a catharsis to it all. The two people who had brought me into the world were gone, but they gave me the tools to survive in it, they shaped the person who mourned them. Each room was filled with evidence that I was loved, and I have it on good authority that love is important.
But my father’s workshop was different.
When I turned on the lights I wasn’t reminded of the afternoons I spent keeping my father company while he worked on his projects, or of all the toys that my father built me when I was a kid. No, there were no memories at all.
All I could focus on was the object hidden beneath a bed-sheet in the center of the room.
A part of me wanted to turn around and leave whatever my father’s final project was a mystery, but I knew myself well enough to know that the question of what was hidden beneath the bed-sheet would steal sleep away from me forever. I gripped my hand around the cloth and pulled.
It was the same lawn mower that Mr. Clarke had back in the 80s. Its over-the-top impression of the future seemed nearly comical by modern standards, but there was something attached to its sleek metallic frame that chilled me to my middle-aged core. Two red flashlights focused on me.
‘LOVE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING,’ Zorbo’s voice box whispered out of the core of the machine, ‘BEAUTIFUL LAWNMOWER
(Zorbo's insatiable hunger
submitted by MikeJesus
to nosleep [link] [comments]
2020.10.10 12:06 waterbottles4 Unilend Finance - Public Sale Form is Open
Hi friends, i want to tell you about UniLend project which will be listed on October 15th.
UniLend is a permission-less decentralized protocol that combines spot trading services and money markets with lending and borrowing services through smart contracts.
: Any ERC20 token will be able to list without any entity controlling the listing process, making UniLend’s features accessible to every token.
*Lending & borrowing
: Users have the capability to unlock their token’s functionality for lending to receive an interest rate and for borrowing by paying an interest rate.
: A corresponding trading pair will also operate on UniLend's platform to include decentralized spot trading functionality for platform users.
: The protocol will be governed by its token holders through proposals in order to ensure adjustments to the protocol are made with a majority consensus.
: By providing liquidity for asset trading and loans on Unilend's platform, users are able to receive fees in proportion to their liquidity pool stake.
*Native Utility Token
: The native utility token of UniLend will be UFT, Unilend Finance Token. The token will have multiple use cases for governance, platform utility, and much more.
How is UniLend different to existing DeFi protocols?
Existing DeFi solutions have left the majority of digital assets outside of the DeFi ecosystem. There are over 6000 tokens listed on coinmarketcap. However, the current platforms such as Compound, Aave, Maker DAO, and many more, support less than 30 assets.Some protocols offer lending and borrowing with a limited set of tokens while others offer the freedom to trade any ERC20 assets but neglect the lending and borrowing aspect.
UniLend is bridging that gap by combining the decentralization aspect of enabling any ERC20 to be utilized as collateral for lending & borrowing whilst providing the flexibility for users to also trade their assets in-platform. Ultimately, UniLend aims to unlock the full potential of digital assets for their owners.
UniLend Successfully Raises $3.1M in Seed and Private Sale Rounds Amid Overwhelming Strategic Investor Support
Unilend funding rounds attracted the attention of some of the industry’s heaviest hitters, including Woodstock Fund, Signal Ventures, 3Commas, Danish Chaudhry (Head of Bitcoin.com
Exchange), Jay Putera (Partner at CryptoBriefing.com
), TRG Capital, BTC12 Capital, AU21 Capital, Youbi Capital, TomoChain, Bidesk, Bibox, Tenzor Capital, and Sandeep Nailwal (Co-founder of Matic Network).
*Total Supply: 100,000,000 UFT
*Initial Circulating Supply: 7,777,778 (7,78%)
*Seed Round Price: $0,07 (25% released after 6 months, 25% after 12 months, 25% after 15 months and 25% after 18 months)
*Seed Round Hardcap: $700,000 (reached)
*Private Round Price: $0,12 (25% release at TGE, 25% after 3 months, 25% after 6 months and 25% after 9 months)
*Private Round Hardcap: $2,400,000 (reached)
*Public Sale: Will be done early next week, Hardcap $150,000, interest form (open for 24 hours) + whitelist (lottery) + sale FCFS - Fixed Personal Cap: 3 ETH (Public Sale form is open now)
UFT token will be listed on October 15th on Uniswap.
UniLend protocol is working to create a new niche in the market which has been neglected and untapped by current solutions in the DeFi space. I believe team efforts will create a level playing field in the market by enabling every token to be a part of the growing DeFi ecosystem.
Website Twitter Telegram Linkedin Medium Reddit
submitted by waterbottles4
to ICOAnalysis [link] [comments]
2020.10.09 22:13 HighResDreams Seeking Hawaii Travel Partner?
I know this might be a longshot, but I'm posting here in hopes of finding a travel partner that I could go to Hawaii with. I've been incorporating more fruits/veggies into my diet now for a few years, and I've been messing around with the diet in the sense that I've noticed I feel so much more healthy and better in my body when I'm eating mainly fruits.
I'm not a strict raw vegan/fruitarian per say, but I am a strict hardcore vegan, so when I'm not eating raw plants I'm eating cooked plants. I've been vegan for about 2 and a half years now. I will be vegan forever. I can go raw for a few days and maybe even a week, but I always fall back into eating the cooked vegan food. I think if I travel to Hawaii it will be much easier to stay raw because I'll be motivated because of the tropical environment, plus I will have access to higher quality rare exotic tropical fruits which is what I'm after.
It's been my dream to go to Hawaii for some time now. I don't know any other raw vegans/fruitarians in real life. That's why I'm posting here. I haven't been to Woodstock lol.
Anyway, I think it would be so much better to go with a like-minded individual who I can connect with and share the amazing experience with. It would also be better from a social aspect because I would have someone to talk to. It would also be better from a financial aspect because we could share some of the costs making things cheaper so we could stay longer.
If anyone is interested in actually doing this send me a PM for further details. Thanks y'all.
submitted by HighResDreams
to Fruitarian [link] [comments]
2020.09.29 18:54 vishalhkothari UniLend Successfully Raises $3.1M in Seed and Private Sale Rounds Amid Overwhelming Strategic Investor Support
| || | submitted by vishalhkothari to Unilend_Finance [link] [comments]
UniLend is thrilled to announce that we have successfully closed our Seed and Private Sale funding rounds! The response has been incredible, leading us to quickly achieve the hard caps for both rounds, totalling $3.1M in investment. In the process, we have built a strong network of early supporters to contribute to the long-term success of UniLend.
Our funding rounds attracted the attention of some of the industry’s heaviest hitters, including Woodstock Fund
, Signal Ventures
, Danish Chaudhry (Head of Bitcoin.com Exchange
), Jay Putera (Partner at CryptoBriefing.com
), TRG Capital
, BTC12 Capital
, AU21 Capital
, Youbi Capital
, Tenzor Capital
, and Sandeep Nailwal (Co-founder of Matic Network
We’re inspired to see that our vision for a new era of inclusive DeFi has resonated with the highest calibre of seasoned investors and industry players.
The successful completion of our Seed and Private fundraising rounds is an important step in the journey of UniLend. Aside from establishing a solid initial base of token holders and supporters, our Seed Round and Private Sale investors have been selected based on the value which they will be contributing to the long-term success of UniLend.
These contributions include assistance with listing a broad initial base of tokens on UniLend with initial liquidity through their relationships with prominent projects, liquidity bootstrapping for a smooth user experience from the early days of the platform, and global and regional marketing efforts to generate awareness of our platform and our mission worldwide. With the expertise of the core team and support from our early investors, UniLend is in an extremely strong position to disrupt the DeFi market.
The next major steps in UniLend’s journey are our public token distribution event and platform launch, both of which will take place in October.
Onwards to a new DeFi paradigm
As a decentralized protocol, community governance is a central aspect of UniLend. A number of factors relating to the proper functioning of the protocol, such as the collateralization ratio for specific assets, addition of base pairs etc. will be decided by UFT holders via proposals which require majority consensus to be implemented.
Public distribution of UFT is designed to facilitate the broad distribution of governance power for the UniLend platform and to foster the growth of a large initial supporter base. Our public distribution event will take place in October, along with the launch of the UniLend platform. We’re excited to announce the full details soon!
There’s already a lot of interest in UniLend from the wider community and the media, and our outreach efforts will begin to ramp up heavily soon. We’ve also partnered with industry-leading blockchain marketing and consultancy firm Lunar Digital Assets
to accelerate our efforts to bring the word of UniLend to the entire crypto ecosystem and beyond. Strap yourselves in.
We believe the next evolution in DeFi is the inclusion of not only any participant, but the inclusion of any asset which users wish to utilize for DeFi. UniLend is making this a reality, and our progress on all fronts is going strong. This is the calm before the storm; our journey has only just begun. Together with our strong community and partner network, we’re well on the way to unlocking the true potential of decentralized finance. Chandresh Aharwar, UniLend Co-Founder & CEO
The UniLend team would like to thank our community for your incredible support thus far, and we remain at your disposal should you have any questions. Don’t hesitate to reach out to us! Website: https://unilend.finance/ Telegram community: https://t.me/UniLendFinance Announcements channel: https://t.me/UniLendAnnouncement Twitter: https://twitter.com/UniLend_Finance
2020.09.29 05:31 mynameskittycat Micro Wedding/Ontario/Cottage Rental
Hi everyone, my fiancé and I got engaged in March of 2019 in Prince Edward County. We live in Toronto and all of our family live in Southern Ontario. We met in Thunder Bay while in school.
I am looking for a small cottage like venue. There will be approximately 14 of us (myself, my fiancé, his parents (divorced +1 each), my parents, my brother, his brother and partner, and finally my grandparents). We would require 7-8 bedrooms.
My fiancé and I love heritage homes. He is a project manager for historical buildings. It would be neat to find somewhere with some history. I wouldn’t be interested in new builds, unless they are ultra modern and art in themselves.
Our thoughts for a wedding were: - the 14 people - 3 night stay, 2 for us on either end, 1 for guests - ceremony on-site, maybe on a dock, in the woods, somewhere scenic, must have fire pit - dinner on site, potentially hiring a chef to cook dinner, stay the night, and cook breakfast - most of our family doesn’t drink, we could purchase enough alcohol for everyone - we would require a photographer and flowers
I’ve already checked Airbnb and Vrbo but haven’t found anything substantial. Most don’t have proper bedroom set-ups to accommodate.
I would be interested in exploring inn’s if they don’t have outrageous packages ($7k plus) We are interested in areas around Woodstock, Hamilton, Brantford, West to Lake Huron, as far north as Gravenhurst and as far east as Kingston.
Does anyone have any recommendations for micro cottage venues?
Not sure if we are looking at fall of next year or 2022. At this rate, we might just head to city hall...
submitted by mynameskittycat
to weddingplanning [link] [comments]
2020.09.18 01:53 Armchair_Detectives What is the most likely explanation for the Murder of Ralph Probst, a case that has baffled investigators for over 50 years?
Ralph Probst was a Cook County Sheriffs Officer who was murdered in the late hours of April 10th 1967. Over the years the case has lead investigators to those close to him, the mob and a series of potentially related murders. The Murder
Ralph Probst was a 33 year old father of 3 who had worked as Sheriffs Officer in Cook County, Illinois for 3 years. On the night of April 10th he and his wife Marlene were awake in their living room watching the Oscar's together.
Marlene later said she had fallen asleep and awoke suddenly to the sound of glass breaking and a loud bang. Their home was quite open plan and She spotted smoke drifting behind the tv from the kitchen and went to investigate. Marlene found Ralph lying on the floor unresponsive with blood pooling around his head. Investigation
By the time Marlene had called for help and it had arrived Ralph was dead, he never regained consciousness. He was found to have died from a gunshot to the back of the head, the bullet appeared to have ricocheted after it went through him and ended up lying on the kitchen Hob.
The bullet was analysed and found to have come from an extremely rare .41 calibre Magnum, the weapon it had likely come from had only just begun manufacture. The weapon was never recovered and hasnt been used in any other crimes. Only 2000 guns capable of firing such a bullet were owned in the United States at the time and none of the owners have ever been linked to the case.
Police were baffled by the crime scene as they found that a window had been shattered when it had apparently been shot through, the problem for them was that the glass all lay on the path outside and not in the kitchen. It was one of just several parts of the case that would later lead to disputed claims made by various investigators. Theories Marlene
Suspicion quickly fell on Ralph's own wife, she was the only adult in the house at the time and police found her claims of hearing glass breaking and a loud bang questionable. Many feel that the bang of a gun firing should have prevented her hearing the glass break as the bullet passed through it. Police also found the angle the bullet entered Ralph's head to suggest someone outside the window or in the room with him but shorter in stature then him.
Marlenes own testimony that she saw smoke in the kitchen when she awoke also lead to police believing the gun had been in the house when fired. The surmised that Ralph may have struggled with a killer in the kitchen, causing the gun to fire out the window shattering the glass onto the path outside before he was then overcome and shot dead.
Marlene was cleared by police officially when a test was carried out firing a gun through the same kitchen window. In the test when the gun was pressed to the glass when fired it caused gun smoke to enter the room and glass to fall outside only. Some have later called this test into question as a standard police .357 firearm was used and not the .41 calibre weapon that was actually used in the crime.
A separate theory that was later advanced about Marlene was that she may not have directly killed Ralph but set him up for the killing by asking him to fetch something from the kitchen at the right time. Police believe the killer couldnt have waited long at the window for fear of being seen and so would have needed to know Ralph would be standing in the kitchen with his back to them. It has been theorised that he either had stepped in to make a call on the kitchen phone or had been somehow compelled to step into the kitchen at that moment. The Mob
At the time of his death Ralph was assigned to a special department unit called the tactical squad. His partner at the time was Bob Borowski, he and Ralph had encountered a notorious local mobster named Sam DeStefano only a few months before Ralph's death.
During this encounter DeStefano had been serving time in prison when he became ill, Ralph and Bob were assigned to guard him at the local hospital while he was being treated. Bob later said that Ralph's by-the-book approach annoyed the aging monster and once Ralph had kicked out guests from his room and cuffed him to the bed as was regulation DeStefano had told him he would have him killed.
Bob Borowski believes that Ralph was waiting for a call on the kitchen phone when he was shot, he has stated this was a favoured mob tactic when carrying out a hit to ensure the victim was where the shooter needed them to be.
DeStefano was later cleared by investigators as they couldnt find any evidence he had placed any kill order out on Ralph and at the time wasnt believed to still have to clout to call for such a killing. Frank Calvise
It has long been suspected that Ralph may have been working off duty on a case involving a Vice ring in Cook County. Ralph was discovered to have paid a visit to an ex-convict named Frank Calvise who was a suspect in this ring at the time.
Police learned of an unusual individual who resembled Calvise that had viewed a property for sale across the street the week before the shooting. The home owner told police he kept asking if the house closely resembled other houses on the street. Police believe this man was establishing a floor plan of Ralph's home.
The neighbour who reported the odd house viewing later changed their story and said the police had coerced them. Many believe they were scared into changing their story.
Bob Borowski believes that Ralph had information that was critical enough for someone to want him dead. He learned that Ralph had made several calls from a pay phone at a gas station on the day of his death. It's been surmised that Ralph may have been waiting for a call from a contact when he was shot dead through the window. A Fellow Officer
While not supported by the police investigation, many media reports have suggested Ralph was the victim of a fellow officer. The single well placed shot to kill him and the rare weapon used in the killing have been pointed to as potential evidence of this.
It has been said that Ralph's by-the-book approach and strict adherence to the rules may have made other officers dislike or distrust him. In this scenario a dirty cop is suggested as the killer.
This theory doesnt hold up well much like several others when no .41 calibre weapon was believed to belong to any of the officers on the force and not even to anyone in Cook County at the time. The Silas Jayne Connection
Silas Carter Jayne was a Chicago-based stable owner who was implicated in multiple savage crimes in his lifetime.
Convicted of rape as a teenager, he spent a year in a reformatory before he and his brothers went on to become horse traders and successful stable owners in the 1930's in Woodstock, Illinois. While his brothers went on to serve in WW2, Silas was ineligible due to his Rape conviction and spent the war trading in horse meat. He was described at the time as a savvy businessman with a bullying personality.
During the war years he also made a considerable amount of money selling worthless horses to wealthy men who believed these were championship horses. He was supported in this endeavor by members of the Chicago Elite who were his patrons.
Silas went on to boast to friends of how he often molested the young daughters of these wealthy men when they would visit the stables. He went on to use this to brand the girls as promiscuous if any of the businessmen caught on to his scams.
A man named Kenneth Hansen came to police attention in the 1990's while they were investigating a missing person case. An informant revealed that Hansen had murdered 3 young men while working as a stable hand on Silas Jaynes ranch in 1955. It emerged during the investigation that Silas had been aware of the crimes and likely used his own car to help dispose of the bodies. While Silas was never charged with the crimes, Kenneth Hansen was tried in 1995 and found guilty before the conviction was overturned and the case was re-tried in 2002 whereby Hansen was found guilty and sentenced to life in prison.
Silas Jayne is also suspected in the disappearance of Ann Miller, Patricia Blough and Renee Bruhl who all disappeared in July of 1966. They had reportedly gone boating with one of his Stable hands and didnt return. It was believed at the time that Miller and Blough who boarded horses at Silas' brother George's ranch may have witnessed the planting of a bomb there that went on to kill a young woman named Cheryl Lynn Rude.
Silas was believed throughout the 1950's and 60's to have contracted several hitmen to kill his brother George. He was caught in the attempt to hire a hitman when a sheriff posing as one recorded him requesting they kill George. He was later acquitted of the crime of conspiracy to commit murder when the states key witness suddenly developed amnesia.
It is believed after this close brush with the law that Silas had then decided to kill his brothers business by calling the IRS on him instead. His brother was subsequently indicted for income tax fraud.
In 1969 Silas successfully claimed self defence when he shot dead Frank Michelle Jr, who was attempting to replace the battery on a tracking device that his brother George had placed there previously. During the shooting he used 3 different calibres of weapon and used a vice grip to crush Franks testicles.
Silas brother, George Jayne would finally be murdered in 1970 when he was shot through the heart while standing at his basement window while hosting a bridge night with family on his sons birthday. Silas was charged and convicted of the murder in 1973, he was sentenced to 6 to 20 years but was released after just 7 and died in 1987.
Since his death, Silas Jayne has been suspected of involvement in the still unsolved murders of the Grimes Sisters in Cook County in 1956 and the disappearance of Helen Brach, the heir to the Brach Candy Fortune who vanished in 1977. At the time of her disappearance she had been locked in a bitter dispute over animal welfare with Silas Jayne and an associate named Richard Bailey, Bailey would later be charged with conspiracy to murder her and to defraud her. He was only convicted of the fraud charges and Silas Jayne was never convicted in her disappearance.
The connection put forward by investigators later in their investigation into the death of Sheriffs Officer Ralph Probst was that he was working on his off duty hours to crack a horse price fixing and insurance racket being run by Jayne and Bailey at their respective ranches whereby they had so-called experts on their pay role recommend worthless horses to wealthy investors. Helen Brach discovered the scam when an investigator she hired recommended she invest nothing in the horses on either ranch.
The method by which Ralph died is uncannily similar to the manner in which Silas Jaynes brother George died. No concrete evidence has ever linked Ralph's death to the horse dealers or Helen Brach and many believe the truth of the murder may lie with someone he knew well but the rumours persist to this day.
Modern investigators now believe that Helen Brach was likely murdered by her houseman who was likely defrauding her of money at the time. His statements to police have been called into question and her whereabouts cant be substantiated after she was last seen with him. The houseman has no connection to Silas Jayne or Richard Bailey. Conclusion
Many involved in this case, both suspects and investigators are now long deceased and the case has been cold for sometime with no new leads since the early 90's.
What do you believe is the most likely explanation for the senseless killing of a Sheriffs Officer in 1967?
Does it lie with the horse trade, is it a dirty cop or reprisals by a slighted mobster or could it be someone closer to home? UNSOLVED MYSTERIES LINK SILAS JAYNE Grimes Sisters Helen Brach
submitted by Armchair_Detectives
to UnresolvedMysteries [link] [comments]
2020.09.04 18:57 welcometosouthapp Welcome to South App #6: "Greek Invasion"
Friday, September 4th, 2020
I can’t believe Winston’s making me do this on my birthday!
It was sunrise on Gigi’s 19th birthday. She dragged a gas-powered chainsaw across the North Campus quad. An hour earlier, Winston had woken Gigi up with a phone call. “Fetch my chainsaw from under the bed and meet me at the library.” Click. Not even a “Happy birthday.”
So, she’d rolled out of bed in a white tank top and baby-blue yoga pants. Call it morbid curiosity. Only Winston could come up with such demands, after all.
Gigi was streaked in oil and sweat. She hobbled to the library entrance and let the hunk of metal fall to the ground. North Campus was a vast expanse of willow trees and solitude at sunrise. But something was very…off.
Suddenly, Winston popped out of the bushes and pointed a pistol at Gigi’s forehead. “You’re alone on campus on a day like today,” he rattled off. “Out of the blue, some hooligan hops out of the bushes and tells you to wring your pockets. But you’re wearing a sundress, so you don’t have any pockets. So instead, he-”
“YEET!” Gigi screamed, kicking Winston’s crotch. He crumbled to the ground, hitting a falsetto.
“Oh...shit! I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”
“Shiiiet, it’s all right,” Winston moaned, rolling over on his back. Gigi’s frowning, pale face eclipsed the rising sun. “Happy birthday. It’s a Smith and Wesson Bodyguard. Too small for me. Be mindful of the trigger-pull and recoil. But I reckon it’s compact enough for your frou-frou jeans.”
“Oh! I...thank you! But why?” The warm gun fit in her small hand like a glove.
Winston stood up. “Hell, you’ve had my back since I got here. I reckon I oughta return the favor. I ain’t the brightest slice of pie in the knife drawer. But as long as you’re the brains, I may as well make due and be the brawn.”
I stole your other gun and our friends stole your fake IDs! is what Gigi wanted to say. “You...make me feel really safe, Winston!” is what she actually said, slipping the gun in her purse.
Winston lifted the chainsaw. “Welp, it’s time to cut some ties. We’ve got a rat in the frat. Some Alpha Beta Kappa brother pretendin’ to be one of us. See that tree down yonder? That’s their secret meet-up spot. And it’s gotta come down.”
ABK, or “All Big Kocks", started as a frat that met in an off-campus apartment. Then, Clyde (son of Dean Dale Crenshaw) took over. Overnight, the funding skyrocketed. This Honors Music Fraternity was BDE’s greatest rival. Live shows every Friday night, a 3.8 GPA entrance criteria, and co-ed. “Why go to any other frat parties?” Clyde would always argue. “When the women are already here?”
“So, about this rat,” Gigi mused, following Winston to the tree. “You asked him nicely to leave?”
“Well, let’s just say he’s branded for life. Name was Taggart, and we actually rushed together. Poor bastard.”
The lumberjack revved the chainsaw. His large pecs and biceps bulged under his shirt as he put that smoking-hot metal to work. He’d easily replaced 20 pounds of fat with muscle. And as that hundreds-year-old tree crashed to the ground, Gigi reminded herself to stay on his good side.
“Let’s get the fuck out of here!” Winston yelled, taking off. “They’ll arrest you too! Hell, you’re the one with the filed-off serial number.”
“W-what?!” Gigi’s voice cracked as she sprinted past him.
“Fuckin’ with ya, Gigi.”
Gigi rode shotgun in Winston’s truck. She kicked off her flats and began massaging her sore feet.
“Um...I definitely stink,” Gigi laughed nervously, slipping her shoe back on. That was Winston’s cue to roll the window back up. She reached into her purse and pulled out the huge charcoal bath bomb that she stole from Sarah. “Dear Chadwick Hughes’ spirit: all I want for my birthday is a bath!”
“Hmm.” Winston drove past Firewater Hall toward Greek Row. “You’re a wanted woman,” he reminded her. “If we go to the house, you’re gonna have to sneak in. If Ryan finds ya, he’ll put your head on a pike.”
Ah, Gigi thought. Because we snuck in, punched him out, and blew up his father’s ashes. Seems...fair.
They pulled up to the BDE house and saw Ryan’s white BMW in the driveway. Winston shut off his Roush engine and instinctively pulled Gigi’s head into his lap, hiding her from plain view.
“Here’s the plan, birthday gal. I’ll go upstairs and grab a shower in the guest bathroom. I’ll save ya some hot water. Wait here, and I’ll text ya when everything’s ready.”
Winston slipped inside. Gigi lay across the passenger and driver’s seat. She thought about bailing and driving to Denny’s for free birthday pancakes. But Winston had the keys. And as her sweating, greased-up body melted in that god-awful hot truck, she decided that she really wanted that bath.
Gigi drifted off to sleep. In her dreams, she sat at a kitchen table in a massive Beverly Hills mansion. In front of Winston were a birthday cake and a huge gift bag. “Happy birthday, Winston!” she exclaimed. Winston reached into the bag and pulled out his lost Colt Single Action Army. “Ta-da! It’s your gun!” Then, he pulled out his lost BDE binder. “Ta-da! It’s your fake IDs!” Finally, he reached into the bag and pulled out a pair of yellow and white striped panties with a lacy bow. “Ta-da! It’s my virginity!”
Gigi bolted awake to her phone vibrating. A text from Winston. Ready. Use the ladder. She sat up from her puddle of sweat and made her way around the side of the house.
At the top of the raggedy fire escape ladder, Gigi reached the second-story open window. Tea candles lined the shelf of an elegant clawfoot bathtub, filled to the brim with steaming water. Beside the tub was a shower caddy containing a bottle of merlot, a bag of chocolate-covered almonds, several high-end soaps and face masks, and a note.
To my partner in crime: I reckon we managed to evade the law quite a few times since we moved here. Truth is, ain’t no bathtubs in jail. Now, enjoy all this bougie shit that I found in Claire’s room. Happy birthday - Winston.
“He writes just like he speaks,” Gigi whispered, holding the letter to her chest.
Gigi stripped down to her underwear and neatly folded her clothes in a pile. On the floor was Winston’s t-shirt and blue jeans from earlier. I’m sure he’ll wear that again! She slipped off her yellow panties. After some thought, or no thought at all, she stuffed them into the back pocket of his jeans.
Gigi lowered herself into her first college bath. Even the water felt softer and silkier than in the dorm, whose water flowed from lead-flavored pipes. She picked her brain for every get-rich-quick scheme in the book, aspiring to live in such comfort full-time.
I could blackmail Sarah and Tai about that binder, she thought, submerging her head under water. Maybe I can convince them to give me a cut of their profits! So that a poor student like me can buy clothes that aren’t secondhand! But that would mean keeping the fake IDs a secret from Winston and betraying his trust...
Gigi shot up from the water, gasping for breath. She rubbed her eyes and slicked back her jet-black hair. Then, she unwrapped the bath bomb. It fizzled as a milky grey mist clouded her entire bath.
Winston, would you forgive me? Gigi lifted her hand out of the water and read her nearly-faded tattoo. And if I take a cut of their earnings, I’ll buy the cutest outfits to wear for you. I’m-
She lowered her tattooed hand into the cloudy water, where it disappeared between her legs.
“I’m ready for you, Winston.”
“Look at this swole son of a bitch!” greeted Brother Twinston, as Winston entered the cozy living room after his shower. They and eight other pledges dressed in white button-downs and tan slacks, adorned with a BDE pin on the collar.
Winston grabbed Twinston in a playful headlock. “I reckon ain’t nobody gonna be able to tell us apart now.”
“I reckon you’re right, stunt double!” Twinston agreed. This young man was a spitting image of Winston in looks and spirit. They had met at a frat party after taking whiskey shots and reaching for the pickle jar at the same time. Bromance at first sight.
“Enough faggotry,” Ryan commanded, walking up the podium by the fireplace. As the de-facto alpha of the room, his pomade-style hair stood taller than everyone else’s. Seven AM on Friday was BDE’s weekly meeting, and brothers were expressly forbidden from taking Friday classes. Because as soon as this was over, the weekend pre-gaming would commence.
“Now, Winston!” Ryan began. “Looks like your sausage fingers got some dirt under your nails. I trust the deed was done?”
“As motherfuckin’ Shakespeare said: the tree fell, nobody was around, and it still made a fuckin’ sound. I reckon ABK’s hideout is being hauled off by a truck as we speak.”
“You’ve never had a way with words,” Ryan pointed out. “But I gotta admit: you get shit done. Now, if another rat wants to show their face, I got no problem burning down their momma’s house. Next on the list. We gotta talk about two of our…ex-members. Claire and Connor. She packed up the rest of her shit and slipped out of here last night. I’ll be posting an application for Social Chair on our Facebook page.”
Last week, after Winston had caught Claire cheating on him with Frank, she had officially stepped down from BDE.
“Hell, let’s break tradition and make it a man, for Christ’s sake!” Twinston piped up. Despite only being a sophomore, he had clout among the senior brothers.
“I’ll consider it,” Ryan said, shrugging. “You know women: always afraid of commitment. Bitch didn’t even give a reason for leaving. Although I’m not gonna lie: I’m gonna miss those tits during strip poker.”
Two muscular black brothers gave each other a crisp high-five.
“Now, onto Connor. Not only did this beta bitch get a DUI, but he had our motherfucking coke on him.” Ryan tossed a bag of red-and-white cocaine on the coffee table. “Now what the fuck did we say about taking coke out of the house?”
“Don’t go to the buyers - let the buyers come to you,” the brothers responded in unison.
“Final topic of conversation,” Ryan announced, holding up a saloon-style wanted poster. “I’d like to announce that I've delivered swift, painful justice to the bastards who stole my father’s ashes.” On that poster were security camera photos of Frank, Tweed, and Chad - their faces X’d out. Next to their images were lo-res pics of Gigi and Sarah. “I’m increasing the bounty to 2500 bucks for whoever brings me the other two cunts.”
This bounty was news to Winston. Nobody knew he was even related to Sarah, or that Gigi was currently bathing upstairs. While the brothers salivated over the reward money, Ryan swiped a fire poker cast with BDE at the tip. “We took those three bastards out to the quad and branded them for life! Sent their bitch-asses packing. But as for these two dumb sluts...I think they were the masterminds of the whole goddamn plan. I say we tie ‘em down and apply directly to the forehead!”
“Yeah, man, fuck these ho’s,” Winston played along. “They did your daddy wrong. But real talk, I say we track ‘em down and exile them from the fuckin’ campus for life. Ain’t no use in getting thrown in jail for assault. Hell, that’s where those bitches belong.”
“Winston, I’m disappointed in you, chief,” Ryan said condescendingly, slamming the poker on the fireplace with a loud clank. He walked over to Winston and stood eye-to-eye with him. Dead silence. Finally, Ryan cracked a douchey grin.
“All right, all right,” Ryan chuckled. “I’ll go easy on ‘em...that is, if they drop to their knees and suck every last drop from us until they fucking drown!”
The brothers roared like animals, chanting Ryan’s name as he ripped open the bag of red-and-white cocaine. Winston forced a painful smile as the nausea set in. Ryan leaned over the coffee table and proceeded to snort his usual Friday-morning line.
“WHO’S GOT MOTHERFUCKING BIG DICKS?” Ryan screamed psychotically.
“WE DO!” the brothers yelled, banging their chests.
“AND ON MY DEAD DAD’S GRAVE! IF ANYBODY CROSSES BETA DELTA EPSILON, WE’LL DISEMBOWEL THEM AND SHIT DOWN THEIR THROATS!”
Ryan flipped over the glass coffee table, shattering it into pieces.
The massive South Campus quad was speckled with students playing ultimate frisbee, strumming guitars, and pretending to study. It was Tai’s happy place. Ever since Jacky turned him loose, he and Sarah had been practicing Krav Maga during sunset. A zen-like hobby that helped him clear his mind and shrink his erection.
Tai landed a shaky roundhouse kick as he spotted a young lady in the corner of his eye.
“I’ve got your rematch, Sarah,” Tai jeered, landing a sloppy jump-spinning crescent kick. But as he stuck the landing, he witnessed Gigi in a traditional kimono and a chopstick bun.
“I accept your challenge in Sarah’s stead!” Gigi cheered, bowing deeply.
“Wait...huh? Where’s Sarah?”
“Ah, in celebration of my 6,939th day on Planet Earth, she elected to maintain a record of meeting notes in my dreadful Comparative Literature enrichment!”
A blank stare from Tai as he slowly shifted into a guarding stance.
“I mean...it’s my fucking birthday, so she went to class for me!” She kicked off her flats and crouched into a grappling stance. “Now, will you hand over a third of your fake ID profits? Or will I have to spill the Bush’s Bourbon and Brown Sugar baked beans to Winston?”
“W-what?! Who told you?”
“Hmmm...twas but a whisper in the wind - a grape from the vine!” Gigi inched toward Tai, who cautiously backed up.
“Okay, look...don’t, um, don’t do anything drastic! We’re gonna pay it back to him, I promise. If you think about it, we’re just doing the work for him. It’s just that...well, it’s been a tough week so we can’t really afford to give you that kind of money!”
“As you wish. I’ll have to beat it out of you instead!”
Tai threw a lunging side kick. But the swift Gigi virtually teleported behind him. She jammed her thumbs into the tender spot below his ears.
“Fool, a petite fighter such as myself must play defensively,” Gigi bragged, regrouping. “I’ve been watching you. Looks like those kicks have thrown you off balance, Mister Flat Foot!”
“You can kiss that ID money goodbye,” Tai scoffed, rubbing his pressure points.
“That’s perfectly fine, grasshopper! I don’t intend to ask for it.”
Tai side-stepped and tried for a sweep kick. Gigi raised her leg over her head like a Chinese gymnast. He fell forward from his own momentum, but Gigi pressed her foot against his face to stop the fall. She wiggled her toes, then gave him a firm roundhouse to the side of the head. Tai fell back onto the grass. As he lost his breath, she wrapped her arms and legs around him from behind. A rear-naked chokehold that Sarah would've been damn proud of.
“Jaleo gada, jaleo gada, jaleo gada,” Gigi cooed in Korean, squeezing his windpipe. And “go to sleep” he did.
Ten minutes later, Tai sat up with a start, drenched in sweat. A ring of students surrounded him.
“Break it up, dudes and dudettes!” Sarah exclaimed, forcing her way through the crowd. The students dispersed as she helped the oblivious Tai to his feet.
“Oh...fuck,” Tai groaned. He fumbled for his minimalist metal wallet. Six-hundred dollars in cash was gone.
“You got robbed, my guy?” Sarah asked, kigh as a hite.
“That’s not even the half of it. This is bad. I have a lot to explain to you.”
Tai recapped his encounter with Gigi, while he and Sarah sipped lattes on the library’s top floor.
“Holy mother of balls,” Sarah whispered after Tai explained Gigi’s blackmailing.
“Look, maybe we come clean. Do you think you can talk to Winston?”
“Not a chance in Woodstock,” Sarah replied, frantically shaking her dreadlocks. “My brother’s all about loyalty first. He’d cut my hair while I was asleep and he’d circumcise you while you were awake.”
Tai instinctively covered his crotch as they stopped at a bulletin board. “So...we’re Gigi’s bitches," said Tai. "If we owe her a cut every time we make a sale, we’ve gotta find a better market.” On cue, he swiped a flyer from the bulletin board. TONIGHT: Alpha Beta Kappa proudly presents the Housewarming Masquerade. $10 cover. All students welcome.
The good ole’ southern twins stood on the wrap-around porch, whiskey in hand.
“Look, brother,” Twinston started, patting Winston’s back. “I’ve known Ryan for a year. I know he can get a little...impulsive with his words. But that don’t mean he’s impulsive with his actions. You’re worried about them two girls, aren’t ya?”
Winston was one text message away from telling Gigi and Sarah to flee campus. During last month’s frat party, he had never thought to question why Frank and Gigi had shown up in the first place. It never occurred to him that they were there to blow Ryan’s father’s legacy to smithereens.
Ryan stumbled out in a bright red bathrobe that matched his stuffy, red nose. “Shit, I almost forgot to ask ya, Winston,” he slurred. “I meant to collect your fake ID money for this week.”
Winston was so close to coming clean. Some jack-off stole the binder! he wanted to say. But the punishment for having lost it would be swift and fierce. So, he reached into his wallet and pulled out 600 bucks, straight from his own student loan account.
“Geez, tough week again, huh?” Ryan jeered, snatching the cash. “Where have you been trying to sell them?”
“Oh, you know...the regular beats,” Winston lied. “I reckon I ain’t gonna hit the library on weekdays no more.”
“The library?” Twinston repeated, bewildered. “Shit, what’s it like in there? Ain’t never been.”
“Not your brightest moment, I’m not gonna lie,” Ryan chuckled at Winston. “But, at least you learned your lesson for next week.” Winston nodded, taking it on the chin. If he had to make another withdraw, there wouldn’t be a “next week.” Winston had to find that ID thief.
“Whoa, what the hell?” Twinston pointed at a fleet of U-Haul vans, led by a 2021 silver BMW. They watched as the vehicles pulled into the driveway of the empty frat house next door.
“Holy fucking shit,” Ryan gasped. “It’s motherfucking Alpha Beta Kappa.”
The bald driver opened the butterfly doors. Thick marijuana smoke trickled out of the car. The passenger doors sprang up, and out hopped a freckle-faced redhead with a pornstar body. She brought a wheelchair over to the driver’s side and helped the bald guy into the seat. Then, she marveled at the huge mansion and jumped up and down in her stilettos, her huge breasts bouncing in her tight corset. She rushed into the new house, pausing to give Winston a quick glance before she entered.
Another redhead, huh? Winston thought. My favorite flavor.
The bald guy rolled over to the BDE house in his wheelchair, a present in his lap. His large biceps and tattoos were on full display in his worn Guns N’ Roses sleeveless tee. His jeans were bleached and destroyed and his black Converse were spotless.
“What’s up, neighbors?” the paraplegic spoke in a loud, baritone voice. He handed the present to Ryan. “I’m Clyde, President of Alpha Beta Kappa. Looks like we’re gonna be seeing a whole lot of each other.”
“Uh...yeah, my name’s Ryan.” He extended a hand while using the other to dab his bloody nose. “So...I thought Tri-Delt leased the house next door.”
“I assume you know sororities almost as well as I do. Truth is: women are too damn afraid of commitment. You gonna open that present or what?”
Ryan slipped off the bow and tore the wrapping paper. It was a penis pump.
“Now, let me lay down some ground rules for you and your twins,” Clyde continued, straightening his posture in the chair. “There’s only room for one big dick on Greek Row. Now you may think you have a big dick. But there’s a gang of nine-inch fresh-cut cocks in town.”
Clyde whistled with his fingers. The U-Haul truck doors rolled up. And out came a cavalry of ABK brothers, hauling furniture toward the house as they chanted “All Big Kocks!” Like pallbearers, they each grabbed a corner of expensive sofas, desks, and beds. Posing on top of each piece of furniture was a topless ABK sister. The brothers escorted them like royalty into the soon-to-be furnished mansion.
Clyde unfolded a flyer from his back pocket and handed it to Ryan. “Bring your asses tonight. There are plenty more tits where those came from.” It was an invitation to the ABK Housewarming Masquerade. Clyde swiveled around and rolled back on over to his new house. “By the way!” Clyde called out. “I don’t condone Taggart for spying on y’all like he did! I don’t care who you work for: a rat is a rat!”
“That’s bullshit,” Ryan whispered. He knew good and well that Taggart’s spying was planned and coordinated by Clyde himself. “If they’re gonna spy on us, we’re gonna do the same fuckin’ thing to them.”
“Sit back and relax,” Winston finally broke his silence, standing tall next to his doppelganger. “My twin and I will crash this party and dig up as much dirt as possible.”
“And he and I are the only two who can be in two places at once,” Twinston added.
“Then we infiltrate tonight!” Ryan announced. “Because gentlemen, Greek Row is a pair of tight spandex trunks. And there’s only room for one big dick.”
Watching Tai work was amazing.
At the ABK Masquerade, the masked Sarah sat at the bar in the massive concert venue. Clyde’s 90’s cover band was onstage. Like clockwork, the masked Tai would sniff out gay clientele, grab a fake ID from the binder, approach him, make out with him on the dance floor, and come back with a fistful of dollars.
“I’m averaging one sale per song,” Tai panted, wiping somebody’s lipstick from his mouth. “Here, hit me with another ID!”
“You do know this is borderline prostitution, my dude?”
Prostitution or not, they racked up a thousand bucks in the first hour. And with Gigi taking a cut of their sales, they were going to need that extra money to keep this operation afloat.
“Take a break, will ya?” Sarah suggested, patting the barstool next to her.
The freckle-faced redhead from Clyde’s BMW was bartending. She wore bright blue fairy wings, a lacy corset, and a glittery half-mask. “Two lemon drops, my loves,” she cooed in a Scottish accent, setting the drinks on the bar. “Aw, I love how comfy you two look!”
Tai and Sarah were dressed down in South App hoodies and yoga pants: items that every female or gay student owned. The goal was to not stand out while selling fake IDs. And yet, they had failed to wear masks.
“I prefer to dress like I do around the house,” the fairy said with a smile, fluttering off to help the next patron.
Outside, Winston and Twinston - the twin spies - walked up the ABK steps in matching button-downs, slacks, and white opera masks. They psyched each other up. The “Who’s got big dicks? We’ve got big dicks!” standard affair. Suddenly, a pack of drunk girls stormed out the front door and spilled an entire glass of cranberry vodka on Winston’s khakis. “Suck it up, buttercup!” she slurred, stumbling off with her posse. Co-ed fraternity girls were a different breed.
“Shit,” Winston muttered, looking down at the mess.
“Better go change, brother,” Twinston suggested. “I’mma gather some intel until you get back.”
Winston retreated to the BDE house while Twinston entered the party alone. He stood at the entrance, absorbing the nostalgia of the 90’s rock set. Permanently-seated Clyde was on drums. A crowd of groupies sang along up front while everyone else gathered on the dance floor.
“Jack and Coke,” Twinston told the fairy bartender. “If you have time.”
From the dance floor, Tai and Sarah were casually mingling and making fake ID sales. They were also people-watching. “It’s fucking uncanny,” Tai began, pointing at Twinston from afar.
“I’m telling you, that’s not Winston,” Sarah argued. “If you want proof, ask him to drop his pants. My brother has a birthmark on his upper-left ass cheek.”
“That dude could fool almost anyone though. But a sister always knows.”
Suddenly, all eyes shot toward the front door. In walked a young South Korean student in a baby-blue evening dress. Trailing behind her was a long, ornate satin train. The side-splitting fabric exposed her white-laced garter belt that ran from her thighs to her matching open-toed high heels. Instantly, she won the room.
Clyde hit the final snare, ending his Jane’s Addiction cover. “Well, don’t just stand there, princess!” Clyde called out to the woman, beckoning her onstage with a drumstick. “Come on up and introduce yourself.”
Princess Gigi obliged, but not before giving Tai and Sarah a passing glance. “I hope you’re on your A-game with those sales,” she whispered with a devious grin. “Because I need money for a red dress just like this one!”
Sarah tugged on Tai’s sleeve. “Let’s get the fuck out of here!” she hissed. “Hey...uh bartender?”
“I’m Miri,” the Scottish redhead responded. “But I bid you call me Miri.”
“Miri, care to point us to the back door?”
Tai and Sarah slipped through the kitchen and out the back door. Miri kept pouring for thirsty patrons, all while eyeing this Korean bombshell on stage.
“Um...hi, everyone!” Gigi greeted, while the seated Clyde held the microphone to her mouth. “It’s my birthday today, and...I’m sober! Who wants to help me change that?”
Every man on the dance floor cheered like Quentin Tarantino with a glass slipper. Their girlfriends gave Gigi dirty looks, holding their men close. Clyde leaned into her ear. “Don’t let me catch you paying for a single drop tonight.” He turned around and rolled back to the drum set. He clicked his sticks and began a Chili Peppers cover. The party was back underway.
“Another Jack and Coke,” Twinston requested from Miri. “Make it a double-shot.” From the bar, he’d watched the entire spectacle. Now, Gigi was walking over to him.
“Please read,” Gigi said, plopping down next to Twinston. She slipped the thin fabric of her dress to the side, exposing a pale white thigh. Then, she reached under her garter belt for a letter. She slid it across the bar, showing off her baby-blue painted nails. Twinston peeled off the heart-shaped sticker and unfolded the letter. Written in cursive was the most kinky, depraved to-do list of sex acts he had ever seen. At the bottom was a signed statement: For my birthday I, Ji-hye “Gigi” Moon, hereby sign my virginity over to Winston Arnold Beavers.
Clearly, Gigi had the wrong man.
As soon as Miri returned with Twinston's drink, Gigi swiped it. She sipped her first taste of whiskey through a straw, her bedroom eyes growing wider and wider. She slammed the glass of ice on the bar. Then, she leaned into Twinston’s ear and passed an ice cube from her mouth to his.
“Hey, uh...bartender?” Twinston stammered, as Gigi ran her tongue across his fuzzy beard.
“Back door’s through the kitchen,” Miri laughed in a Scottish accent as she watched the flirtatious pair.
Twinston grabbed Gigi’s hand and jetted out of there. If Winston caught them, he’d impale them with his chainsaw and cut the engine on. So they cut across the back yard and entered Twinston’s first-floor bedroom through the window. She immediately slipped out of her dress, leaving on nothing but the heels and garter belt. And as the masked girl spread her legs, Twinston kept telling himself that this was consensual.
Winston entered the ABK house in a filthy pair of blue jeans from that morning. The crowd waved their lighters while Clyde’s band played Semisonic’s “Closing Time.” Seeing as it was last call, Winston made a bee-line for the bar. “I’ll have a Jack and Coke, Miss,” Winston said to Miri, tipping his hat. “If you have time.”
Miri cocked her head, her wings and eyebrows twitching. “Wait...what’s going on?” she asked, taken aback by Winston’s twin from five minutes earlier.
“Alcoholism, that’s what,” Winston chuckled. “Why, I reckon you’ve just seen a ghost. Wanna have a drink with me to calm the spirits?” He was here to gain ABK intel. But her freckled face, wavy red hair, and Scottish accent were definitely a bonus.
“Apparently so!” Miri laughed, her breasts bouncing up and down in that tight corset. “Tell you what: I’ll toast with ya.”
Miri poured Winston’s Jack and Coke and the umpteenth cranberry vodka of the night. But like the mystical fairy creature she was, she garnished her drink with a handful of blueberries, a splash of lemon juice, and a basil leaf.
“Seventy-nine,” Winston randomly said as they clinked glasses across the bar.
“Seventy-nine. I reckon that’s how many freckles you have on your face.”
“Ah...well, let’s see. I've never counted before. But on my whole body? Well...we’re definitely in quadruple digits.” Miri leaned in close, the scent of gin and spearmint on her breath. “If you want to take me to my room and count them, I can do 150 an hour. That is, if you’re a fast counter.”
Winston chuckled, then slipped something into her henna-tattooed hand. “I mighty appreciate it. But I’d rather ya tell me a little bit about this place. Thinkin’ about pledging.” A lie, of course.
Without missing a beat, Miri slapped a bag of blue-and-white cocaine on the bar. “Tell ya what: you try ours and I’ll try yours.” Right in front of everyone, she opened the bag of red-and-what cocaine and split it into lines.
Winston’s jaw dropped. It was all coming together in his slow-churning mind. Taggart and ABK had been gathering intel to corner the entire fucking college cocaine market. While Miri dropped her head to do a line, Winston slipped his rival’s cocaine into his pocket. All right, I’ve got what I came for. No thanks to Twinston. Time to report back to Ryan.
“Yo, the concert’s over but the night has just fucking begun!” Clyde announced on the mic. “Ladies only: get your asses to the center of the dance floor. You know what time it is!”
Miri’s head shot up from her third line of cocaine. She released an orgasmic Scottish moan. Then, this mystical fairy pranced into the center of the room, spun on her heel, and gave a curtsey in her outfit.
What the hell is going on? Winston thought, sipping his whiskey. He reached into his back pocket for a napkin and felt something else instead. Slowly, he held Gigi’s lacy yellow panties in front of his face. Miri, how the hell did you put this in my pocket without me noticing? Hell, I reckon this bitch is a fairy after all.
“DJ, hit the music!” Clyde commanded. Fergie’s “London Bridge” blared through the speakers and rang across Greek Row. The tipsy Miri swayed her hips to the violent bass beat, shedding her wings. Applause erupted from the crowd.
“Now just what are we to do about this corset?” Miri cooed, puckering her lower lip.
“Take it off!” the brothers chanted. And she did. Winston instantly realized that her “1000-freckles” estimate was correct.
“Lose that skirt!” the crowd commanded.
Winston nervously tapped his foot. Not because he was afraid of seeing a naked woman. That road was heavily-traveled and full of potholes. But Miri was drunk, and nobody was doing a damn thing about it. She hooked her thumbs beneath her pink-and-blue skirt and pulled it down to her ankles. No underwear, and a hundred more freckles on Winston’s scoreboard.
“Make yourself decent, moron!” Winston called out, sling-shotting the yellow panties across the room to Miri. She reached up and caught them, red-eyed high and shit-faced drunk. “These…these aren’t mine. But they sure are cute!”
What?! Who the fuck do they belong to then? And why the fuck were they in my pocket?!
Regardless, Miri slipped into the tight panties. She gave a polite curtsy and fluttered away through the kitchen and out the back door.
“Yo, what the fuck man?” Clyde raged as he watched the action from his wheelchair. “You fuckin’ scared her off! DJ, cut the music!”
Fergie stopped singing and all eyes fell on Winston. He took a deep breath and boldly stepped into the center of the dance floor. “She was fucking wasted, partner. Are y’all really gonna make her do all that?”
“It doesn’t fucking matter,” Clyde seethed. “It’s Friday: we drink, and Miri strips. She’s a whore. And that’s what whores do. Who the fuck do you think you are anyway? S-s-somebody take off his mask!”
But Winston removed his own mask and tossed it on the floor. There he was: invading ABK just as the phony Mississippian Taggart had invaded BDE.
“Leave it to a Beta to look for pussy at an Alpha’s party!” Clyde jeered over the mic. “Can you all believe this white-knight faggot tried to stand up for a fuckin’ whore?”
Winston couldn’t resist a comeback. It was too easy. “At least I can actually stand, you fucking cretin.”
Every single hand covered a gasping mouth. Winston turned and walked into the kitchen, building up to a sprint out the back door. Rabid yells from behind as he cut across BDE’s back yard, dashing past rows of trees and street lights to the end of Greek Row. At the dimly-lit street sign, he collapsed into the grass.
Winston, ya done fucked up now.
“Yo, you okay, bro?” somebody called out.
Winston looked up and saw two douchey frat boys carrying acoustic guitars. Before he could get up, one of them had already hoisted him to his feet. He winced as he put pressure on a sprained ankle.
“You had way too much, my man!” Guitar Guy 1 said. “And it’s not even nine yet. Gotta pace yourself!”
“Yeah, man,” agreed Guitar Guy 2, brushing grass off Winston’s shoulder. “Hey, why don’t you come with us to Alpha Beta Kappa’s party? I hear our president’s band is fuckin’ killing it tonight.”
Winston felt his soul leave his body. Suddenly, Guitar Guy 1’s phone rang.
“Hello?” Guitar Guy 1 answered his phone. “Hey, what’s up, Clyde. Yeah, yeah, we’re almost there. We’ve got our guitars and...huh? Oh shit, you talking ‘bout the guy dressed like a cowboy? Yeah, man, he’s right here. Drunk as fuck, I’ll tell ya h’what. Wait, what? He said what to you? No, fuck that. FUCK. THAT! Yeah, man, we’re gonna take care of him right the fuck now!”
Winston slowly backed up to the street sign, a hot pain searing through his ankle. Running was out of the question.
“You so much as move, we aim for the head,” said Guitar Guy 2, shouldering his weapon.
Winston placed his back to the street sign and sank to a seated position. He looked up at the fretted assailants. Not with fear, but with acceptance. “I know all about your frat’s cocaine operation. And all I gotta say: I’m gonna run it into the motherfuckin’ ground.”
Guitar Guy 1 went for a cross slice, cracking the guitar against Winston’s head. He bled before he hit the grass in a fetal position. His body convulsed in a seizure.
“Yo, no face shots!” Guitar Guy 2 screamed, kicking Winston in the ribs to vent his frustration. He brought his ax above his head and hammered down on his gut. Winston released the death cry of a wounded gazelle. But instead of delivering that final blow, the Guitar Guys looked at one another and nodded. Then, they dropped their pastel board shorts and proceeded to piss on Winston’s wounds from head to toe.
“Look at the sign and tell me what the fuck it says, cuck!” Guitar Guy 1 yelled, stomping his face with his boat shoes one last time. They zipped up their shorts and ran off. A groaning Winston wiped his bloody, sopping-wet face and looked up at the sign. Crenshaw Ave. Just like his father’s legacy, Clyde was here to stay.
Winston blacked out.
It wasn’t rape. It was my choice. It wasn’t rape. It was my choice. It. Was. My choice.
Gigi stared at her reflection in the dorm room mirror. Tears and mascara flowed down her face, streaking her cleavage and her wrinkled gown. With fumbling hands, she unwrapped a Plan B Morning-After Pill and slipped it between her dry, chapped lips. She cupped some water into her hand and swallowed, gripping the edges of the sink as she looked back at the defiled girl in the mirror. Hours earlier, she had been pure. Now, she stank of sweat, Walmart-brand musk, and a stranger’s bodily fluids. It was only when Twinston had taken off his mask that she’d realized she had made love to a man she did not know.
Only minutes to midnight. Soon, the wrinkled evening gown would disappear, and Gigi would be reduced to dirty rags and cloths. “This...this is certainly the kind of dress I would want to die in,” she told her reflection, forcing a smile as she permitted tears to flow freely.
A fall from the seventh story would surely kill Gigi. She envisioned her mangled corpse on the gnarled roots below. Then, she feverishly latched onto something to keep her alive for one more day.
Froyo! Tomorrow was the grand opening of the local frozen yogurt joint. I’ll get to choose my favorite sugary toppings to pile on my watermelon sorbet. But tonight, I didn't choose to have sex with that man. It was not. My. Fault.
Gigi’s phone rang. It was Sarah. “Gigi, get your ass down to the third floor - quick!”
Gigi flew down the stairs, tripping over a few drunk students in the process. She stood in the doorway of Room 309, where a bloodied cowboy lay his head in Sarah’s lap. Tai sat on the futon, handing Sarah gauze and rubbing alcohol from the first aid kit.
“Gigi,” Winston mumbled. He lifted his head, then set it back down as he erupted into a coughing fit. “You look...great. Not as sexy as my sister though. But I’m from the South, so it’s family first. Roll tide...”
Sarah and Gigi smiled weakly, seeing how Winston was slowly returning back to normal. But Gigi’s smile turned to shock as she got a closer look at his face. One eye was swollen shut and bleeding from the corner. A large knot on his head oozed pus, even as Sarah frequently dabbed it with a tissue. His twitching body hinted at the lacerations and bruises beneath his bloody t-shirt. And through Winston’s smile, he was missing a bottom tooth.
“Everybody fucking leave!” Gigi exploded, dropping to her knees and laying her head on Winston’s chest. He winced at first, but slowed his breathing as she held his hand. She sobbed her eyes out, soaking Winston’s shirt and beard.
“Gigi, look,” Tai said, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Winston needs all of us right now. Not just-”
Gigi fetched the 22-caliber pistol from her purse and slammed it on the tile floor. “I SAID GET THE FUCK OUT! OUT, OUT, OUT!”
Winston’s heart raced as Gigi squeezed his hand with all her might. “It’s all my fault,” she whispered, as if they were already alone. “If only I let you keep your gun, you could have defended yourself.”
“Buddy, that just ain’t plum-fuckin’ true. Ain’t nobody’s fault but mine. I talked shit and got hit.”
Sarah and Tai quietly slipped out the door, most likely to count their fake ID earnings.
Gigi positioned Winston’s head on her lap and ran her small hands through his messy brown hair. “This ain’t the first time you caught me covered in piss. Reckon it won’t be the last.”
Gigi giggled. “I’ll...I’ll be here all night to protect you.” She clutched the gun with one hand and ran her fingers through his hair with the other. “And we can wash your hair in the morning.”
“Thanks, buddy. I reckon I done gots me a few enemies now. So...ya ain’t gonna let the piss fairies sneak in and give me a golden shower...are ya?”
“I...I won’t let you down!” Gigi laughed, gripping the gun. “And if the pee bandits come around here, I’ll politely escort their hind keisters a third-of-a-dozen floors north, where their skin shall bubble under the 100 Kelvin internal temperature of our antiquated heating and cooling apparatus!”
“Shit,” Winston moaned, closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep. “If they don’t fix your AC sooner or later...you may have to move down here and live with me.”
While Winston rested, Gigi stood watch all night. She forgot all about what Twinston had done to her. Misery loved company. And while Gigi never wished for anything bad to happen to Winston, his timing couldn’t have been better.
submitted by welcometosouthapp
to welcometosouthapp [link] [comments]
2020.08.19 21:00 portlane Robert Gill (Nov. 2, 1936 - July 3, 2020)
Robert Forrest Gill
Nov. 2, 1936 - July 3, 2020
Robert F. "Bob" Gill, 83, a gentle Christian man and dear friend to many, died peacefully after a two year battle with brain cancer. He attacked his cancer with a positive attitude, to never give up, give it his all and beat this disease. He lived his life daily by the Bible verse Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your Heart."
His life was full of meaningful relationships. Bob was a loving and caring husband to his wife Faith, who passed away in 2018. High School sweethearts and married for 61 years, they made their lives together a "True Love Story."
Growing up in Portland, Ore., Bob attended Oakley Green grade school and graduated from Jefferson High School ('54). At Jefferson he ran track and played football for the Democrats. As quarterback in 1953, during the Coach Tom Desylvia era, he was First Team All-PIL and earned a berth to play in the annual Shrine All-Star Football game. He received scholarships to Portland State and Oregon State College, and 50 years later in 2005 he was inducted into the PIL Hall of Fame.
In 1954, Bob played "Rookball" at Oregon State followed by one season as quarterback at Portland State. He returned to Oregon State winter term to finish pre-dental studies, and pledged Phi Delta Theta fraternity, where he developed many lifelong friendships. Shortly thereafter, Faith followed him to Oregon State where they became "Forever, Beaver Believers."
After Bob was accepted to the University of Oregon Dental School, Bob and Faith married June 22, 1957. As a dental student, seeking extra income to support a growing family, he used his artistic ability to provide illustrations for two dental textbooks. Graduating in 1961 at age 24, he fulfilled his military duties and moved the family to Camp Pendleton, in Oceanside, Calif., where he was a Lieutenant in the Dental Corps of the U.S. Navy.
In 1963, they moved to Medford, Ore., where he opened his first solo dental practice. Moving to Portland in 1970, the family settled in the Eastmoreland neighborhood, with Bob establishing his dental office in the neighboring Woodstock area.
Becoming a dentist was the perfect career choice for Bob. One really didn't know if it was the dentistry he enjoyed, or all the relationships he had with his patients and his treasured dental staff, whom he treated like daughters. In 2008, after 47 years of dentistry at age 71, he announced his retirement.
From athlete to sports historian to author, his retirement was full. As a member of the Multnomah Athletic Club since 1982, and a former racquetball player, Bob was asked to join the intramural doubles Handballers and never looked back. Bob loved playing with his large group of buddies, which he nicknamed: "his loved ones." With his often-tournament-doubles-partner Ed Grossenbacher, they won two back-to-back MAC Club doubles masters championships, State masters Doubles, and in 2008, the Pacific N.W. Regional 70+ division title. In 2018, the group honored him with the MAC Cebula Award.
Bob's connection to sport and community continued. In 1987, Bob became a board member for the State of Oregon Sports Hall of Fame. For six years, he was chairman of the selection committee. During this time, he discovered his great interest in sports history. An avid writer, Bob dedicated many years to researching Oregon's athletes and coaches, including authoring "It's in Their Blood, a History and Legacies of 53 Oregon Football Coaches" and writing the biography for Jefferson alumnus and dear friend, Mel Renfro in "Mel Renfro: Forever a Cowboy."
He was a board member of Oregon's Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Past president and board member of the Portland chapter of the National Football Foundation and Scholarship program. For years he presented the "walk of champions" award to high school coaches at their annual awards ceremony.
Bob successfully nominated into the Nation College Football Hall of Fame: Oregon State's coach Tommy Prothero, Linfield College coach Ad Rutschman and Portland State quarterback and former NFL player Neil Lomax.
In 1998, Bob initiated, with the help of Neil Lomax and his company Promax, the return of the Shrine All-Star football game to the Portland area, renamed as "The Les Schwab Bowl." Bob was acting chairman and presented the MVP trophy for 20 years.
All of this was a platform for Bob to showcase his love of sports and people. Over the years, he worked to bring people together. Never without his camera, Bob Loved planning reunions to reminisce about experiences and how those experiences built long-lasting memories.
His last banquet was his most treasured honor, the induction into the State of Oregon Sports Hall of Fame in 2019 for his special contribution to sports. Bob was honored that so many friends and family came to support him.
Bob's friendships from his school days to organizations to dental patients were important to him; he nurtured those relationships and took a real interest in their lives. He was a genuine person; an encourager and always put others first. You really saw that Bob lived his full 83 years.
Bob is survived by his four children, Michael (Tina), Scott, Amy Candello (Dave) and Alison Bruun (Scott); six granddaughters, Miranda Maynard (Jeremy), Emily Candello, Marissa Gill, Natalie Bruun, Brittany Gill and Katie Bruun; and his brother, James Gill.
He was preceded in death by wife, Faith; father, Thomas Gill; mother, Marian Reid; brother, Tom Gill; and sister, Suzanne Frink.
Due to COVID-19, Bob's celebration of life will be held at a later date.
Please sign the online guest book at www.oregonlive.com/obits
submitted by portlane
to deadpeoplepdx [link] [comments]
2020.08.18 21:22 ellessdeemz One of the most intense and introspective trips of my life 250ug trip report
I had a pretty insane trip last week, it was my second highest dose, 250ug, and my 5th time doing a dose higher than 200ug, it had been a good few months since I had done a higher dose and I was a little nervous but also very excited.
We’ve just moved into a house with my best friends and it was a super nice day so we planned on tripping and enjoying the sun and the good music. Me and one friend did 1 and a half 165ug crystal caretaker tabs so 250ug give or take (if you know, you know they’re the real deal). And my other friend did just one tab, he isn’t as experienced with acid as much but was still super buzzing to trip.
So we drop about 11am and get ourselves ready for the day, we head out to the shop to get some supplies for the day, some food and drink and some ciggies and by the time i was paying in the shop I could already feel lucys effects creeping in, vision looking slightly clearer, become over aware of the sounds of the door opening, cars driving past and what not.
We start heading to check out this park we’d only been to once before and we really wanted to explore the new area we had just moved into, its about 11:45am and were set up on the park, got some nice music playing and by this point, my visuals are starting to come on already, light patterns in the trees and grass, feeling giggly and super excited to trip.
After a while, probably by like 12/12:15 the visuals keep becoming more and more intense and I start to get myself into a slighly negative thought pattern being like, “im tripping really hard already I think the peak will be too much” and “why do i do this to myself” which is not the best thoughts to be having coming up on 250ug. I was quite anxious and on edge but i kept my cool round my friends as they were having a great time, i didn’t want to say anything that would make them think that im not having the best time incase it made them not have a great time, we’ve probably all been there at some point.
Some more time passes and my visuals are pretty strong at this point, like a strong 150ug dose and its only been 90 minutes, i was getting quite overwhelmed and being sat in the same spot in quite an open place of the park wasn’t doing me any good, we decide to get up and explore, we head off to a part of the park we had never seen before, were climbing trees and my friends are having a laugh enjoying how beautiful the visuals are, kaleidoscopic patterns covering my vision, insane morphing of faces and my skin was super see through, it was so cool, but at the time i was so anxious and it was pointless anxiety. I was trying to distract myself by keeping my head occupied with conversation and with my surroundings which were melting around me, the visuals were unavoidable.
So my anxiety is at its peak at this point and we venture off the path and into the woods area of the park and im trying to keep my cool, Ive done acid 20/30 times now so I’m pretty good at not completely losing my shit, but I’d rather enjoy my trip rather than just being uncomfortable till the peak passes, we hadn’t even peaked at this point.
So as we emerge out of the woods area theres this field and it was so secluded from the rest of the park, it was an open quite area completely surrounded by trees and a slight skyline of the city behind them, when we reached this beautiful area we were so amazed, but I was feeling so anxious, my other friend had no clue I was feeling like this and his energy was just so pure and it made me feel better him being completely oblivious to me being a little scared and his positive happy energy towards me did help a little, I even posted on this sub reddit looking for comfort or something, fuck knows why I did that, I was going at a million miles per hour.
So at this point its been like 2 and a half hours and we’re beginning to reach the peak and my visuals were something else, I couldn’t focus on anything for more than a few seconds without my visual field being completely immersed in fractals, it was such a pure psychedelic experience, someone replied to my post telling me to let the experience take me, his username was herpderp115, if you see this I appreciate you. When I saw his message my anxiety went, I dont know why but thats all it took, it just all clicked in my head that its a drug, its fine, im fine, it will be okay, enjoy myself, this is my time to enjoy my time with my friends, its a beautiful day, be happy, and in that moment everything was just okay, and i was laughing hysterically at the fact i was getting worked up over nothing.
So by now were just over 3 hours into the trip, were peaking, my vision is like an intense deep dream simulation with overlaying fractals, I was completely immersed in another reality, the veil of reality was lifted and I felt like I had transcended to heaven, it was heavenly. Then Pink Floyd - Echoes came on, I’m a huge Floyd fan, and this song did so many things to me, it touched my soul, I was lay looking at the grass with the speaker blaring above my head staring into the sky lay next to my best friends experiencing pure bliss whilst this 20 minutes of musical genius vibrates into my ear drums, the song sent us somewhere man, it was insane! My friends were so freaked out by the part in the song where all the noises started, I really felt it in my body.
Then we were like Pink Floyd was doing it for us so we put the UmmaGumma album on and “set control for the heart of the sun” that song man, I just wanna say, if you haven’t already the early Floyd album’s are such an experience to listen to in that state, it was so blissful, I was lay on the grass watching my arm melt and blend and reappear in the grass, this was just as intense visually as some 330ug trips I’ve had, made me question if I had actually taken that much, but when I dosed that high it was very pure liquid acid I had and I had dropped some 5 days before so I’m sure there was some sort of tolerance making it not as intense.
Anyway back to the trip report, this part felt like such a hazy dream when I think back to it, it was insane, and it was just so perfect because there was literally nobody who walked past us all day, unless we didn’t notice but we felt like we were the only people in the world, we were running around in joy laughing and just having a great time, when we were running it felt like my vision was starting to tear and I was gonna run through my vision, it was like I had tunnel vision when I ran it was insane.
I ended up finding a psychedelic bootleg of Norwegian Wood by the beatles, if you haven’t heard it, listen here - https://youtu.be/hRZqlsYg9SY
And this song, every word I was picturing all the lyrics in my head, I felt like I was John Lennon, I was imagining the story of the song in my head of the song, I felt like I was living in the 60s my long hair was all in my face and i was closing my eyes seeing these insane colours and patterns, I cannot even describe how it felt but I felt like I was some sort of 1960s hippie at woodstock or some shit, it also made me think a lot about having a partner and a significant other in my life to share these experiences with.
I’ve blabbered on enough about the peak you probably understand how I felt to some extent, so after the peak past we had all the beatles songs playing, red hot chilli peppers, oasis and my friend was like lets roll a joint, I was not down for this idea as weed and acid for me is a hit or miss, I’ll either be chilling or ill go schiz, my friends didn’t listen to the advice of not combining them, by the time my friend finished the joint straight away my friend stood and said “right lets go home now” my other friend said he felt something take over his body and my other friend was really scared by this, he had took the lower dose, was less experienced and was freaked out immediately, my other friend was a little wested out but he was ok, I was completely fine but was a little started by this strange turn.
We pack our stuff up and leave the park a different way we came and become so disorientated we felt like we were lost, this freaked my friend up even more, he was walking very fast ahead of us to get back and he kept turning the wrong way and we had to direct him back, eventually we get back to the house, hes sweating profusely and is pacing around the house, he tells me he’s looping and straight away im like ohhhh ok, this has happened to me before and i get what he was going through so i tried telling him he needs to distract himself and keep himself busy, so I put on a documentary on the telly and went and got a fiddle toy from my room, he was still very on edge chain smoking and acting very strange, he was saying much and after about 45 minutes he just dropped, passed out on the couch was out for a good hour, he wakes up still acting strange and offers to buy us food because he had such a nice trip from the acid I provided him despite him currently being very fucked up still, and he did, after struggling to even figure out how to get it delivered and what not, it eventually comes and he takes a bite and is immediately like “i dont like this” we had not eaten much all day so we felt very fatigued, our brains were like mush and we didnt feel like doing anything.
The next day My friend told me he felt like he had split into two realities after smoking the joint and he was convinced he was still at the park when he was at home, he was saying he was still hearing Echoes pink floyd in his head and I remember seeing him bouncing his leg alot like he was twitching, he said he was bouncing his leg to the song lmao, he said I really did help him feel abit better by trying to talk to him normally and distract him with fiddle toys and stuff and he thanked me for that, but he was convinced after smoking the joint that he wasn’t real, he hadn’t experienced anything like that before and it scared him, it was his best worst trip.
I realised that day that I have so much to work on about myself, I spent the night feeling very melancholy and I even cried when I went to bed, I was so emotional thinking about my family who I dont see as much anymore, but damn, crying felt good, to express pure emotion, it was a well needed trip, and I’ve come out of it wanting to be better person, bring up the people around me and its made me realise tripping every 2/3 weeks aint it, I need time to reflect on these experiences and lasts week intense experience really was a reminder of that, it was an intense but enjoyable therapeutic session but now Im gonna lay off the psychs for a while, cut down on my drug use, and stop smoking so much cannabis and when September comes I want to put all my energy into my studies and getting a promotion at work and overall being that amazing person I felt during those few hours of bliss.
Thanks for reading, im not doing a TLDR cos I really cant summarise that day up, it was magical.
submitted by ellessdeemz
to u/ellessdeemz [link] [comments]
2020.08.03 15:58 JBMdirtybird Lessons in Atlanta northern suburbs?
Man golf is fun and hard. I've been playing for about 20+ years and i'm really starting to take it more seriously and playing a lot lately. Just joined the players club here in the Atlanta area so pumped about that. However, i've come to the conclusion that i need some lessons to figure my swing out as i'm wildly inconsistent and not sure what i'm doing wrong when things are going wrong.
Does anyone have recommendations on where to get lessons in the northern suburbs of Atlanta? I'm in Woodstock for reference, i don't mid a 30 minute drive.
Also, if there are any players clubs members need a playing partner at either bradshaw or trophy club of atlanta let me know. I'm typically down for a super early tee time saturday or sunday.
submitted by JBMdirtybird
to golf [link] [comments]
2020.08.01 13:23 BandJedi Band Protocol July 2020 Community Update incl. 10+ Partnerships & Oracle Integrations
2020.07.29 20:17 DramaticPatience0 [HIRING] 24 Jobs in on Hiring Now!
Hey guys, here are some recent job openings in ON. Feel free to comment here or send me a private message if you have any questions, I'm at the community's disposal! If you encounter any problems with any of these job openings please let me know that I will modify the table accordingly. Thanks!
submitted by DramaticPatience0
to OntarioJobsForAll [link] [comments]
2020.07.21 15:30 Ganesha811 Confession: I wrote a 'Sappho and her friend'-type article on Wikipedia
I've seen posts on here about Wikipedia articles that obscure historical LGBT figures or only refer to their sexuality obliquely. This happens a lot. I should know - I wrote one of them. Mary van Kleeck
was an American social scientist, a socialist, and generally a very cool person. She was also almost certainly a lesbian.
So why is this fact nowhere in the article? Instead, I write, in various places:
Van Kleeck studied at Smith College from 1900 to 1904, where she flourished—studying calculus, writing poetry, and enjoying popularity among her fellow students. ....
From 1928, she was also active in the International Industrial Relations Institute, which she co-led with Mary (Mikie) Fleddérus. Prominent members of the Institute included Adelaide Anderson and Lillian Moller Gilbreth. Fleddérus, a Dutch social reformer, became van Kleeck's lifelong partner and the two women lived together for most of their later life, splitting their time evenly between Holland and New York City each year and exchanging daily letters when apart. ...
In retirement, she lived with her longtime partner Mikie Fleddérus in Woodstock, New York.
Van Kleeck never had any kind of relationship with a man, as far as anyone ever recorded. Her "popularity" at Smith was very real and included getting love letters and flowers from a few female admirers. And of course, she lived with her life partner for over 40 years and they were clearly devoted to one another.
But I can't write that she was a lesbian, because of the way Wikipedia works. It is not allowed to put original research on Wikipedia, and deducing that she was a lesbian from the facts above, while perfectly sensible, is original research. None of the reliable sources cited in the article say she was a lesbian, so the article can't either.
Wikipedia is a mirror of the world - if the academic community avoids a topic or simply doesn't mention it, it won't make it on Wikipedia because Wiki requires citations to adequately reliable sources. The sources on Van Kleeck's life sometimes hint at her sexuality, but never state it explicitly. She was evidently a private person and never discussed the matter in public. So, we're left with supposition and insinuation.
I wrote this post for two reasons:
a) to share the story of a cool person who I'm 95% sure was LGBT
b) to share why, even when it's obvious, a Wiki article might shy away from describing someone as a lesbian or gay
submitted by Ganesha811
to SapphoAndHerFriend [link] [comments]
2020.07.17 19:06 BandJedi BAND PROTOCOL - INFO & RESOURCES - PLEASE READ
| || | submitted by BandJedi to bandprotocol [link] [comments]
**This post will continuously be updated
Band Protocol was founded in mid-2017 and it has now been more than 2 years since we published our first version of the whitepaper. There were lots of things going on this year. We would like to share with you some of the latest information about Band Protocol! https://preview.redd.it/fjzdqy2a4gb51.png?width=1000&format=png&auto=webp&s=d902c04582d7c8a791eb96cd0fff307e3de1f00f Short Introduction Band Protocol
strives to become the go-to decentralized oracle for dApps across multiple blockchain networks by ensuring maximum security, speed, all while maintaining a low cost. https://preview.redd.it/uk95ipd55gb51.png?width=1310&format=png&auto=webp&s=50ff95b99eaf2024169fb717dce4d36120f3d409
To be secure and useful, it is imperative that smart contracts have access to reliable real-world data. For example, all prominent decentralized finance projects rely on a price oracle to function and receive precise time-sensitive data. Betting dApps determine payouts based on a verifiable random number or real-world event from an oracle. To ensure complete decentralization, there must be a secure bridge between trustworthy off-chain data and dApps.
Although there have been multiple attempts to solve this problem, most projects either (1) are insufficiently decentralized
by design, (2) are difficult for developers to integrate
with, or (3) lack economic incentive
for data providers to sustainably feed high-quality information. Illustration: Band Protocol as a bridge between Web 2.0 and Web 3.0
Band Protocol provides a cheaper, faster, and easier-to-integrate decentralized oracle that solves all the problems above. For in-depth info, please visit https://github.com/bandprotocol/bandchain/wiki
🦄 Our investors Binance
, Sequoia Capital
, Dumanu & Partners
, Spartan Group
& many more. https://preview.redd.it/fjzdqy2a4gb51.png?width=1000&format=png&auto=webp&s=d902c04582d7c8a791eb96cd0fff307e3de1f00f
🎤 OFFICIAL RESOURCES
Developer Docs: https://docs.bandchain.org/
Telegram announcement channel: https://t.me/bandprotocolann https://preview.redd.it/fjzdqy2a4gb51.png?width=1000&format=png&auto=webp&s=d902c04582d7c8a791eb96cd0fff307e3de1f00f
📢 MAJOR LATEST UPDATES Partnership & Oracle Integration with ICON https://medium.com/bandprotocol/98137e1c2a3c Partnership & Oracle Integration with Gravity Protocol https://medium.com/bandprotocol/c879b94470d4 Partnership & Oracle Integration with BetProtocol https://medium.com/bandprotocol/9212ffe922ea Partnership & Oracle Integration with Neutrino Proto https://medium.com/bandprotocol/2924a96869b3 Partnership & Oracle Integration with Waves Platform https://medium.com/bandprotocol/6c92f88e3855 Launch of Phase 1 - Guan Yu https://medium.com/bandprotocol/1cb499798683
https://preview.redd.it/fjzdqy2a4gb51.png?width=1000&format=png&auto=webp&s=d902c04582d7c8a791eb96cd0fff307e3de1f00f 🎙️ RECENT INTERVIEWS with CEO
Scott Melker (Wolf of all street): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToZ-K9v9aJI
Tom Deavy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33cUBeEn09o
2020.07.15 14:02 dwright5252 Booster Gold #13 - Timing is Everything
Issue #13: Timing is Everything
Written by: dwright5252
, deadislandman1 <Last Issue **Next Issue > Pompeii, 79 C.E. Post Eruption
The figure appeared in the middle of the burned city, his steps leaving dark imprints on the ashen ground. As he passed the petrified bodies of the citizens who lost their lives to the volcano’s eruption, a small device pinged incessantly at his side.
The trip up the side of Mount Vesuvius was arduous, as hardened lava made for poor hiking conditions. He desperately wanted to teleport directly to his destination, but knew the defenses put in place would have cost him his life.
Hammering in a hook at the peak of the mountain, the man rappelled down into the volcano. The interior was dark now that it lie dormant. He switched on the head lamp connected to his helmet and illuminated the outline of where the entrance to the chamber he sought used to be. He produced a small instrument that fired a thin laser around the edges of the closed portal, the cutting lines glowing like the fresh lava it once was. As the beam connected all the way around, the cut out piece fell to the bottom of the crater, bounding against the inner walls of the volcano in a cacophonous banging before smashing into the floor, disintegrating as the pieces hit.
The man swung his way over to the entrance and quickly pressed the hidden button on the wall that would disable the defenses. However, to his surprise, nothing happened. Shining his light around the small chamber, he aimed it at the pedestal that once housed the shard of the Spear of Destiny.
The dome was on the ground, and the pedestal empty of any contents.
“Son of a bitch,” the man cursed, his lamentations reverberating around him, mocking him for his failure. “I’m too late.”
Somewhere in England, 571 C.E.
“I think we arrived a bit too early here, Skeets,” Booster yelled over the angry throng of medieval peasants as they rushed after them, brandishing torches and weapons at them. “These people are worse than the… what did you call them? Hipsters?”
“I did not ‘call’ them anything,” Skeets replied, a little too cheerfully for Booster’s liking. “*The term ‘hippie’ was common in the 1960’s and 70’s to refer to the counterculture of the United States of America. Typically, the youth of-”
“Don’t need a history lesson, just an escape plan!” Booster interrupted, frustrated at how his “partner” seemed to be of little help on these missions.
After retrieving a piece of the Spear of Destiny from the sinking Titanic and fighting through the haze of Woodstock to grab a piece being used as a guitar slide by someone named Pete, he was starting to lose his temper at the robot. First, Skeets wouldn’t allow him to just blast his way through the already destroyed hull of the infamous ship, then he forbade him from jumping up on stage and grabbing the shard out of the guy’s hand even though, according to history, he was famous for smashing his instrument. Now, the babysitting hunk of metal took his flight ring off of him so that the locals didn’t think of him as some demon.
Fat load of good that did me, Booster thought as a flaming torch whizzed past his head.
“Perhaps we would be able to lose them if you had kept on the training regimen that I assigned you.” Skeets flew ahead of Booster, as if proving his point. “You seem winded for someone who allegedly broke football records in high school.”
“And you seem chipper for a robot that’s going to get dismantled as soon as we escape this mob scene,” Booster muttered through gritted teeth, willing himself to pick up the pace. Using his anger at his situation and his immense desire to get his hands on Skeets, Booster started gaining distance between himself and the mob, losing them in a nearby forest.
“I thought you said the shard would be in that village,” Booster sputtered, leaning against a tree to catch his breath. “I think that family was pretty frakking mad that I just burst into their hovel like that.”
“I believe it was your error that caused the candlestick to be knocked from the table and into the pile of hay, not mine,” Skeets reminded him. “I fear I may have miscalculated where the shard’s signal originated from.”
“You’ve been having a lot of those errors, Skeets,” Booster responded as he grabbed the flying robot, inspecting it all over for any signs of denting or tear in it’s golden frame.
“I am functioning perfectly well.” Skeets pulled itself from Booster indignantly. “Farris explained that my circuitry might be slightly affected by the persistent use of time travel. I need to adjust to the chronal differences, that is all.”
“If you say so.” Booster gave Skeets one last side eye before examining his surroundings, surprised by how much green there was around him. He had seen trees, of course, but not so many in one place. In the 25th century, forests were the size of a small park at most, with a majority of the city space designated for residential and commercial usage. As he caught his breath, he noticed how much… different the air tasted. It was lacking that familiar metallic tinge he had grown up with, and was even different than the less polluted air in the 21st century. It unnerved him slightly, but not as much as the sight of a person in shining golden armor eyeing the two of them suspiciously. The knight stood in front of a large cave entrance, and seemed tense as they looked at the newcomers to the forest.
“Skeets,” Booster whispered and pointed to the knight. “Do you think that knight might know something about the shard?”
“I wonder. Would a knight in the middle of a forest clearly guarding the entrance to a massive cave have any information on a powerful artifact we are trying to procure? That seems highly likely,” Skeets responded sarcastically.
“You’re the worst,” Booster stated, making his way over to the knight.
The knight standing in front of them was slender and smaller than Booster had thought they were from afar, though seemed to radiate an air of strength and confidence as they held a mighty sword in front of them. A horned helmet rested upon their head, and the center of their gold plating held a massive yellow stone in the shape of a shield, surrounded by the shadow of a winged beast.
“Halt!” The knight roared at the duo, dragging their sword across the ground in front of them as if to draw a line in the sand. They spoke in a higher voice with a thick Welsh accent, one different from the other Englishmen they had come across. “Thou shalt go no further, knaves! State your business here.”
“Sorry to bother you,” Booster held his hands in front of him, experiencing the most intense feeling of deja vu. At each of the places they found a shard, they also found someone guarding it. “We’re here on a mission. And can I say it’s refreshing to not need a translator to understand you? That seems really rude of me to say, but all this time travel is wearing me out.”
The knight eyed him suspiciously, keeping a tight grip on their sword. “Are you and your… magic orb agents of that Saxon heathen Vandal Savage? Or the evil sorceress Morgaine Le Fey?”
Booster furrowed his brow. “Skeets, that’s like the millionth time someone’s mentioned Vandal Savage. Are you sure you can’t find any record of him in your database?” He thought back to how one of the crewmen on the Titanic mentioned the guest’s name in a hushed tone, how some of the inebriated hippies had told him tales of a giant stalking the grounds of Woodstock.
Skeets stuttered slightly and sparked before responding. “I am positive. There is no record of any individual with the name ‘Vandal Savage.’”
“Okay,” Booster said slowly, looking at Skeets with suspicion. “We’ll have to check on that sparking thing you’ve been doing every time I ask that question. Definitely nothing suspicious about that. Anyways, we don’t work for that ‘blaggard.’ We’re here to save all of time!”
The knight didn’t respond, instead looking puzzled. Skeets floated over to Booster and leaned close. “Perhaps you should act like you come from this time and pretend you are in league with the king.”
Booster nodded and threw his hands outward in a flourish, bowing deeply in front of the knight.
“Verily!” he shouted, trying to remember anything from the holovids of that Shakespeare character he slept through in history. “Tomorrow and tomorrow, wherefore art thou Romeo? We come in peace, men of infinite jest! We are but players and all the world’s a stage! The king has sent us to retrieve the magic from this cave. Out, damn spot!”
The knight, seemingly satisfied with that answer, if not more confused, knelt in front of Booster. “Then you act as bannermen for the great King Arthur! I now recognize your mark, belonging to the great Wizard.” Ystin pointed at the star on Booster’s chest, clearly impressed by it. “Our goals are entwined. I am Sir Ystin of Camelot, pledged to protect the artifact by Merlin himself in the guise of another!”
“Well, good for you,” Booster said, patting the knight on their back. “Now, if you’ll lead me to the stick, I can-”
“I am afraid this is where we must depart,” Ystin lamented. “I have sworn to hold this cave to my last breath, and shall do so to the last man. Take heed, Merlin has placed many magicks upon the artifact. Only the hearty and true warriors may lay claim to its power.”
Booster rolled his eyes and gave another bow, this time faster and with less reverence. “See ya later, Justin.”
“Farewell, golden traveler! May the Lord protect you on your journey!” Ystin knelt down, bidding the duo luck on their journey. Booster gave a small wave and pushed past the knight to go into the cave.
“Skeets, lights,” he said, and Skeets projected a beam of light into the darkened cave. The robot illuminated a narrow pathway in front of them, with unlit torches lining the walls.
“I shall stay at the base of the cave and ensure you are not disturbed,” Skeets suddenly announced. “Your goggles should allow you to see in the darkness ahead.”
“What’s the matter? You’re not afraid of the dark, are you?” Booster laughed. “Come on, I don’t need a lookout.”
“I was hoping to obtain more information about the shard from the knight, if that course of action is agreeable to you.” Skeets shut its light off and turned towards the cave entrance.
“OK, weirdo,” Booster murmured. This was not the first time Skeets had refused to enter where the shards were held. Every time Booster was about to take the Spear of Destiny piece, Skeets had an excuse for what they had to do in the meantime. He reminded himself to talk to the robot about this when they got back to the Time Sphere.
Journeying deeper into the cave, Booster found himself in a similar chamber to the one inside Mount Vesuvius, but instead of a pedestal with the glass dome and shard within it, he instead found a statue, holding what looked to be the tip of a spear.
He approached it cautiously, searching the room for any signs of traps or hidden dangers. By the time he got to the stone man, he was convinced there was no trickery awaiting him this time.
The statue was carved to look like a stoic knight, with the shard in his hands replacing a sword as his other hand held a shield. Carefully, Booster pulled the metal spear tip from the statue’s hands, and braced himself for it to attack him.
The statue did not move.
“Recognized: Michael Jon Carter,” a mechanical female voice echoed through the chamber.
As the voice’s words subsided, a projection shimmered around the statue, distorting its face to resemble another man, one with sandy blonde hair and a five o’clock shadow. The projection stepped out of the statue and positioned itself directly in front of Booster.
“Michael, if you are seeing this, it means our plan has failed,” the projection said, its voice gruff and hurried. A chill ran down Booster’s spine as he heard his name. Michael is a common name, don’t read into it, a small voice in his head said, but Booster couldn’t shake the feeling this projection was talking to him. “Keep the Spear safe; you cannot allow even one shard to fall into Savage’s hands. I trust you to safeguard the timestream. Remember our contingencies, we’ve trained for this. Good luck, and keep running.”
The projection faded as it gave one last smile, leaving the room dark once more. Booster gripped the spearhead tightly in his hands as he walked from the chamber. What did that message mean? Who was that man, and how did he know who he was? And Savage… That name was too common on this adventure for his liking.
All he knew was this: Skeets had a lot of explaining to do.
Somewhen in Time
“Glad to hear it. We’ll be expecting your arrival,” Farris Knight replied to Booster’s report through the Time Sphere’s communications array. As the signal cut out, Booster leaned back in his chair, cradling the spearhead in his lap as the other pieces lay bundled at his feet.
“It seems that your chronal community service is about to end,” Skeets chirped happily as it fiddled with the controls. “What will you do with your freedom?”
Booster didn’t answer, instead staring out into the timestream.
“Is something wrong?” Skeets asked.
“You tell me,” Booster stated, spinning his seat to stare at the robot. “Because it seems like everybody knows something I don’t.”
Skeets’ visor stared blankly at Booster. “I am not sure what you are referring to, but-”
“Cut the static! You don’t think I’ve noticed how conveniently you’ve been unable to pull records on Vandal Savage? How you aren’t around when I get the spear pieces? I’m not an idiot, Skeets.”
Booster rose from his chair and backed Skeets against the wall. It looked as if the robot was about to speak when the ship suddenly began to rock violently.
The Time Sphere shuddered, sending Booster to the ground. The walls around them vibrated, and he was sure the glass keeping them from falling through time would shatter from the quakes. He held his hands to his ears as the vibrations began to rise to audible pitches.
Suddenly. the massive shaking stopped, and Booster rose from his spot on the ground and looked out of the Time Sphere’s clear bubble to see… the inside of a spaceship?
From what he could tell, Booster and Skeets had found themselves in the cargo hold of whatever had plucked them from the timestream. He exited the sphere and looked around, seeing crates and various equipment strewn around the room.
“Where the hell are we?” Booster asked out loud. Before Skeets could answer, the door in front of him slid open, and a figure burst into the room. Brandishing a rifle that Booster recognized as technology from his era, the figure aimed past Booster and fired a shot directly at Skeets, downing the robot in a spark of energy.
“Skeets!” Booster yelled, aiming his wrist gauntlets at the man, who had rushed over to the Time Sphere and began hitting buttons. As he was about to fire, the man looked up at him, and Booster froze in fear.
Booster found himself looking at… his father? No, it couldn’t be. The scowl was the same, sure, but his eyes… were like his mother’s.
“You stupid idiot,” the man scolded Booster as he picked up the Spear of Destiny shards as well as Skeets, carrying him like a football while he exited the sphere. “You had to mess the timeline up even further, didn’t you?”
His voice… It couldn’t be.
“Are you… me?” Booster asked. The older man laughed darkly.
“Not exactly,” he responded, running his free hand through his sandy blonde hair. “I used to be Michael Jon Carter, but you can call me Rip. Rip Hunter.”
“Wait, hold on.” Booster pushed his way past… himself and further into the ship, rushing through the corridors in hopes of finding a garbage can to throw up in. This couldn’t be happening. Had he messed up the timeline this badly? He took a seat in what looked to be the massive cockpit and clutched his head, the nausea turning into a massive headache. “If you’re Rip Hunter, then who’s the guy who I’m working for?”
Booster’s doppelganger pulled up a picture of who Booster knew to be Rip Hunter, his hair and beard jet black, his face deeply carved and marked as if sculpted by a crude knife, his figure hulking. Booster had been searching his brain for what he thought he looked similar to, and seeing his portrait in this context made it all suddenly click for him.
He looked like what the records showed cavemen looked like, with a pronounced brow, harsh features and larger build.
“This,” he said with venom in his voice, “Is Vandal Savage, and you’ve been helping him conquer the universe.”
Who is this mysterious man that seems to be an older Booster Gold? Why is he going by Rip Hunter? What does he mean when he says Booster messed the timeline up even more?
All these answers, and more, in Booster Gold Annual #1, coming July 29th!
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2020.07.13 17:09 rangfangfoobychops 7 Round Quiz for all to enjoy
This is the fourth quiz I have made and one of my favourites. The questions do tend to have a relatively heavy UK bias but there are many that work globally. First are the 7 rounds and then it's the questions and answers together right at the bottom. Feel free to use this quiz! Enjoy!
Round 1 - Sidekicks and companions
In this round I will name a character and you tell me who their sidekick or companion is.
1) Snoopy (seen with most often)
2) Chuck Nolan (CLUE: An employee of FedEx)
3) Inspector Jacques Clouseau
4) Frodo Baggins
5) The First companion of the 2005 Doctor Who reboot
6) Rocket Raccoon
7) Ariel (The Little Mermaid)
8) Captain Hook
9) The Lone Ranger
10) Mulan (1998 Disney Classic)
Round 2 - Elephant or Castle
In this round I will give you a name and you simply say if it's an elephant, or a castle! Easy.
Round 3 - Mascots
1) Chester. One cool cat without a care in the world
2) Mr Peanut. Sacrificed himself, at age 104, in a fiery explosion #Roasted
3) Fido Dido. A black and white sports enthusiast with his own face on his t shirt.
4) Rich Uncle Pennybags. Spends a lot of time with Officer Mallory and Jake
5) Cornelius Rooster.
6) Julio P. An unstoppable and smartly-dressed mustachioed mascot.
7) Vinnie. The brand's "Number one fan" that once held an eBay auction to quickly
unload some of his goods, no questions asked. Included were paintings of dubious
authenticity, and used shovels, baseball bats, and crowbars.
8) Aleksandr Orlov. According to his website his skills include Business entrepreneurism,
Hallway Archery and 'fluent speak of English language'
9) Flat Eric. Enjoys the beat of electronic music. Has little use for the brand he represents
10) Tony Jr. Replaced his father in the family business in 1975 and is as sporty as ever.
Round 4 - Connection
In this round all the answers are connected in some way.
1) Who gained worldwide recognition for his role as Chandler Bing in the TV Sitcom F.R.I.E.N.D.S?
2) B.A. Baracus was portrayed by Lawrence Tureaud, by which name is Lawrence better known?
3) Which former American Football star was tried for killing his former wife and her friend?
4) Which actor played a talkative shower-curtain ring salesman in Planes, Trains and Automobiles?
5) In 2019 Carol Danvers AKA Captain Marvel appeared on the big screen, which actress took on the role?
6) Most recently credited for playing Eddard Stark in Game of thrones, this actor has announced that
he will henceforth reject roles in which his character dies after amassing 23 on-screen deaths.
7) Which dance icon appeared in at least ten films and 33 partnered dances with Fred Astaire?
8) Who is the proprietor of the hotel in the 1970's British sitcom of the same name?
9) Which knighted British actor convinced director George Lucas to kill off his character in the
original 1977 Star Wars because he was fed up with the role and thought of the film as "Fairy tale rubbish"?
10) What is the connection between the previous 9 answers?
Round 5 - Money
1) Which country produces the 1 Tiyin coin, a record holding lowest value coin worth about 0.0000008 pence
2) What is the oldest currency still in use today?
3) When Charles becomes king of England, which direction will his likeness face on the new coins?
4) In what year were the London Olympic 50 Pence pieces released into circulation?
5) True or False: The Bank of England prints £1m and £100m notes
6) If you had one of each type of denomination in circulation, how much money will you have? (1p+2p etc. This includes banknotes)
7) How many sides on a 50p coin?
8) True or False: Two 1p coins weigh the same as a 2p coin. and two 5p coins weigh the same as one 10p coin
9) Using 10p,5p,2p and 1p coins how many ways are there of getting 10p?
10) Which of the following is NOT a slang term for GBP money: Cabbage. Honk. Ducats. Spuds or Lolly?
Round 6 - Super useless
In this round I will say the name of a character and their "superpower" and it's up to you to say whether they have appeared in a comic or if they were made up for this quiz!
1) Gin Genie. Has the ability to create seismic waves relative to the level of alcohol in her blood
2) Hindsight Lad. Invented himself to weasel into a group of heroes. He mostly criticises people's mistakes.
3) Brick Herman. Strongly believes he has the ability to turn himself into a brick. Once. Forever.
4) Arm-Fall-Off Boy. Has the ability to detach his limbs and use them as melee weapons
5) Dogwelder. A man in a welder's mask who welds dead canines to evildoers
6) Colour Kid. Has the ability to change the colour of an object at will
7) Matter-Eater Lad. Has the ability to eat all forms of matter
8) Twig. Has the ability to turn himself into a tree for a short time
9) Slow Moe. Has the ability to slow himself down significantly
10) Eye Scream. Has the ability to transform himself into any flavour of ice cream
Round 7 - General Knowledge
1) Who was the first Olympic gymnast to score a perfect 10 for her routine?
2) Name one of the three species of bird that produce milk to feed their young
3) Who is generally considered responsible for email spam being named as it is?
4) What is the most common road name in the UK?
5) How many bridges cross the River Amazon?
6) Which colour pill does Neo swallow in The Matrix?
7) In the UK, How old do you have to be to have a shotgun license?
8) Gouda is a popular cheese originating in which country?
9) What do the French call the English Channel?
10) How many keys are there on a piano?
Round 1 - Sidekicks and companions
Q1) Snoopy (seen with most often)
A1) Woodstock (Not Charlie Brown)
Q2) Chuck Nolan (CLUE: An employee of FedEx)
A2) Wilson (From Castaway)
Q3) Inspector Jacques Clouseau
A3) Cato Fong
Q4) Frodo Baggins
A4) Samwise Gamgee
Q5) The First companion of the 2005 Doctor Who reboot
A5) Rose Tyler (The actress is Billie Piper, it's up to you if you want to give a point for her name instead)
Q6) Rocket Raccoon
Q7) Ariel (The Little Mermaid)
Q8) Captain Hook
Q9) The Lone Ranger
Q10) Mulan (1998 Disney Classic)
Round 2 - Elephant or Castle
A1) Castle - Neo-Romantic Castle from 1825
A2) Elephant - The longest surviving war elephant of Hannibal crossing the alps
A3) Elephant - Charlemagne's elephant
A4) Castle - 13th Century Welsh Castle
A5) Elephant - One of the four giant elephants holding up the Discworld
A6) Elephant - The Elephant who helped unify Sri Lanka
A7) Castle - A castle in Bern
A8) Castle - Known also as The Citadel of Bam or Arg-e-Bam. from 579BC
A9) Elephant - Pope Leo 10th's pet and Artist's Muse
A10) Castle - 15th Century Castle, also known as Bow and Arrow Castle
Round 3 - Mascots
Q1) Chester. One cool cat without a care in the world
Q2) Mr Peanut. Sacrificed himself, at age 104, in a fiery explosion #Roasted
A2) Planters. Reborn as Baby Nut in the 2020 Superbowl Advert
Q3) Fido Dido. A black and white sports enthusiast with his own face on his t shirt.
Q4) Rich Uncle Pennybags. Spends a lot of time with Officer Mallory and Jake
A4) Monopoly. The policeman is Officer Mallory and Jailbird Jake sits in jail.
Q5) Cornelius Rooster.
A5) Kellogg's Cornflakes. Chosen because the welsh for Rooster is ceiliog (pronounced Kayleeog)
Q6) Julio P. An unstoppable and smartly-dressed mustachioed mascot.
A6) Pringles. Once you pop, you just can't stop.
Q7) Vinnie. The brand's "Number one fan" that once held an eBay auction to quickly
unload some of his goods, no questions asked. Included were paintings of dubious
authenticity, and used shovels, baseball bats, and crowbars.
A7) Fox's Biscuits (biscwits)
Q8) Aleksandr Orlov. According to his website his skills include Business entrepreneurism,
Hallway Archery and 'fluent speak of English language'
A8) Compare the Market / Compare the Meerkat
Q9) Flat Eric. Enjoys the beat of electronic music. Has little use for the brand he represents
A9) Levi's Jeans (he is a puppet and very rarely seen with legs)
Q10) Tony Jr. Replaced his father in the family business in 1975 and is as sporty as ever.
A10) Frosties (AKA Kellogg's Frosted Flakes)
Round 4 - Connection
Q1) Who gained worldwide recognition for his role as Chandler Bing in the TV Sitcom F.R.I.E.N.D.S?
A1) Matthew Perry
Q2) B.A. Baracus was portrayed by Lawrence Tureaud, by which name is Lawrence better known?
A2) Mr. T
Q3) Which former American Football star was tried for killing his former wife and her friend?
A3) O.J Simpson (Orenthal James)
Q4) Which actor played a talkative shower-curtain ring salesman in Planes, Trains and Automobiles?
A4) John Candy (Steve Martin is also correct but doesn't fit the theme)
Q5) In 2019 Carol Danvers AKA Captain Marvel appeared on the big screen, which actress took on the role?
A5) Brie Larson
Q6) Most recently credited for playing Eddard Stark in Game of thrones, this actor has announced that
he will henceforth reject roles in which his character dies after amassing 23 on-screen deaths.
A6) Sean Bean
Q7) Which dance icon appeared in at least ten films and 33 partnered dances with Fred Astaire?
A7) Ginger Rogers
Q8) Who is the proprietor of the hotel in the 1970's British sitcom of the same name?
A8) Basil Fawlty (Fawlty Towers)
Q9) Which knighted British actor convinced director George Lucas to kill off his character in the
original 1977 Star Wars because he was fed up with the role and thought of the film as "Fairy tale rubbish"?
A9) Sir Alec Guinness
Q10) What is the connection between the previous 9 answers?
A10) Food and Drink
Round 5 - Money
Q1) Which country produces the 1 Tiyin coin, a record holding lowest value coin worth about 0.0000008 pence
Q2) What is the oldest currency still in use today?
A2) Pound Sterling (8th Century)
Q3) When Charles becomes king of England, which direction will his likeness face on the new coins?
A3) Left. It alternates with every appointment
Q4) In what year were the London Olympic 50 Pence pieces released into circulation?
Q5) True or False: The Bank of England prints £1m and £100m notes
A5) True! They are used to back the value of Scottish and Northern Irish banknotes. They are not for public usage.
Q6) If you had one of each type of denomination in circulation, how much money will you have? (1p+2p etc. This includes banknotes)
Q7) How many sides on a 50p coin?
Q8) True or False: Two 1p coins weigh the same as a 2p coin. and two 5p coins weigh the same as one 10p coin
A8) True. Sadly doesn't apply to the rest.
Q9) Using 10p,5p,2p and 1p coins how many ways are there of getting 10p?
Q10) Which of the following is NOT a slang term for GBP money: Cabbage. Honk. Ducats. Spuds or Lolly?
Round 6 - Super useless
Q1) Gin Genie. Has the ability to create seismic waves relative to the level of alcohol in her blood
Q2) Hindsight Lad. Invented himself to weasel into a group of heroes. He mostly criticises people's mistakes.
Q3) Brick Herman. Strongly believes he has the ability to turn himself into a brick. Once. Forever.
Q4) Arm-Fall-Off Boy. Has the ability to detach his limbs and use them as melee weapons
Q5) Dogwelder. A man in a welder's mask who welds dead canines to evildoers
Q6) Colour Kid. Has the ability to change the colour of an object at will
Q7) Matter-Eater Lad. Has the ability to eat all forms of matter
Q8) Twig. Has the ability to turn himself into a tree for a short time
Q9) Slow Moe. Has the ability to slow himself down significantly
Q10) Eye Scream. Has the ability to transform himself into any flavour of ice cream
Round 7 - General Knowledge
Q1) Who was the first Olympic gymnast to score a perfect 10 for her routine?
A1) Nadia Comaneci
Q2) Name one of the three species of bird that produce milk to feed their young
A2) Flamingo, Pigeon or Emperor Penguin
Q3) Who is generally considered responsible for email spam being named as it is?
A3) Monty Python
Q4) What is the most common road name in the UK?
A4) High Street
Q5) How many bridges cross the River Amazon?
A5) Zero! This is because for the entire length it is either too wide for a bridge or not worth crossing
Q6) Which colour pill does Neo swallow in The Matrix?
Q7) In the UK, How old do you have to be to have a shotgun license?
A7) Two. Because an adult needs to sign to say they've known you for two years
Q8) Gouda is a popular cheese originating in which country?
A8) The Netherlands
Q9) What do the French call the English Channel?
A9) La Manche
Q10) How many keys are there on a piano?
Disclaimer: I made this quiz for a bit of fun. This is not intended to be used as a source for any fact checking. Answers were all correct to the best of my knowledge at time of posting but may have since changed. It is up to the quiz master to decide if an answer is worth points, I take no responsibility for any arguments that may break out as a result of this quiz. If you doubt an answer, fact check it! I learned a lot of interesting things creating and researching this quiz.
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2020.07.11 16:57 Potato_Quesodilla Some reviews from my first possets order
The TAT on these was less than 3 days which was really really fast, especially during a sale! Customer service was great, they were able to change the address on my account even after I accidentally put the wrong one. A+
Piece of my heart notes on the website Piece of My Heart Perfume Oil was inspired by Janis Joplin's amazing rendition of the song at Woodstock. This heart-rending blend of sasparilla, honey, Baharat spice blend, saffron, and a light patchouli accord
Okay so did anyone else go through the 60’s phase as a kid? Where you devoured all things 60’s and built Janis Joplin shrines and tried to lecture other 5th graders on the brilliance of Tom Wolfe? No, just me? Anyways I blind bought some things from the Woodstock collection because I obviously just had to. This one is a total love. It smells like gorgeous rich sandalwood (I know it doesn’t have sandalwood in it) mixed with spicy patchouli and the lightest hint of honey. I could wear this forever. I’m not a signature scent kind of person but if I was this would be a heavy contender. It’s sexy and dirty and so so alluring. 10/10
Magic bus-further notes on the website This blend is a bit "trippy" just like the bus's exterior. Sweet fig, toffee, and sugared chestnuts are balanced by a complex accord of warm spices, balsam, and a splash of velvety musk.
I loved this bus as a kid. I used to dream about it after reading ‘The electric kool-aid acid test’ at a whooping 14 years old. Anyways yada yada yada I would have killed for a scent like this as a kid despite that the notes don’t particularly remind me of it. It’s super sweet right away, very sugary. I’m not getting much spice, I’m just getting sugared musk and all the other notes are blending together where I can’t pick them apart. I would love more figs. 5/10 not really wearable for me but it’s going to have a great love on my shelf.
rain dance in the mud notes on the website This aquatic blend includes notes of black currant, bergamot, orange, salt water, seaweed, hyacinth, patchouli, and a deep red musk. It doesn't smell like mud but rather the spirit of joyful dancing in the rain.
The description says it doesn’t smell like mud but...I wanted mud. It’s a pretty seaweed and orange blend that reminds me more of being on a dirty beach. It certainly is joyful but I don’t know if it’s the Woodstock kind of joy. I need to let this one rest more. My partner absolutely loved it and already put it on his perfume shelf so I’m sure I’ll gets lots of chances to sniff it more! 7/10
the moon notes on the website White long silky spun threads of three white musks combined with an almost creamy insinuation of white beeswax carrying a very sophisticated edge.
We are still in the 60’s! This one reminds me of alkemia’s foxfire but creamier. Like a sophisticated my-skin-but-better. It’s not for me though, white musks when overpowered like that give me a huge headache. 2/10 just not for me.
orion notes on the website This one features Oude, rare and unexpected woods and smoked vanilla.
This one took a while to bloom on my skin, I thought I was anosmic to it at first. Eventually the vanilla and the gentle woods come out, but I can’t smell much Oude. This one needs more rest. I’m gonna try this one again in a month or two. It’s very very faint.
midnight mass at St Mary’s notes on the website A resinous incense blend, redolent with polished wood of the pews, the beeswax candles, and offertory fruits. Unisex and perfect for cold weather
Hell yes. I asked my partner what this smelled like without telling him and he said it smelled like candles at mass that they re-use over and over. It smells like old candles, wooden banisters, heavy church incense... heavy, delicious vibes. Smells like cathedrals in Europe. I love love love this. 10/10 makes me feel instantly guilty.
Wallis Wakefield simpson notes on the website rich carpet of three sandalwoods (a golden, a smoky, and a woody) gang up on a sparkle of pink grapefruit, all this is ringed around with a dry and delightful amber to set it off. A pinch of Sicilian myrtle to give it a bit of life
My sample of this one came almost empty, which I’m bummed about. It’s a lot of herbal grapefruit right up front and I can’t really smell the sandalwood. I might just be amping grapefruit but it smells like grapefruit and fresh herbs. It’s unique, I’m going to let it rest more to see if the sandalwood comes out. 7/10 I like smelling like grapefruit salad.
beatrice notes on the website Skin musk, 2 white musks, "Crystalline" musk,and a grey musk.
Way sweeter than I thought it would be. Reminds me a lot of a sweet version of ‘the moon’ (see above). I just have the same problem with it. Too many musks are migraine inducing, I like when musk is used sparingly and not as the entire base of a perfume. Had to wash it off but it basically smelled like sweet candy with musks.
Oujia notes on the website Calming cedar and rosewood, black vanilla, fat vanilla, and a touch of rose to give it a sweet side, black silk scent, and a touch of coriander.
I grew up catholic. Strict catholic parents who would absolutely never allow a Oujia board in the house. All my friends would have sleepovers that I wasn’t allowed at where they would watch ‘clueless’ and conjure the dead and I was so jealous. Anyways I bought this as my small act of adult rebellion and also because I just love cedar so much. This smells like a dusty cedar, like pulling the board out of a dusty utility closet. It smells equal parts spooky and calming. It’s just pretty. It’s a delicious cedar and rosewood sweetened by a tinge of vanilla. 9/10
Jeanne Duval notes on the website This is a tremendously complex formula that includes five ambers (two golden, one dry, one sweet, and one we call Black Amber), add to that African Musk, a drop of aged sweet patchouli, a nice swath of labdanum, a large part of a very, very dry and somewhat woody Bourbon vanilla, a bit of sandalwood, and just the right amount of Haitian vetiver.
When I put it on un-rested I thought it smelled like chocolate. Now that it has had a little bit of time it smells very boozy blended with a little bit of patchouli and sandalwood. The bourbon is the main note on me. It reminds me of a less Smokey version of hex’s ’Kentucky bourbon and woodsmoke*. Very masculine and sexy. 6/10, not particularly for me but I think it’s incredibly well done and would give it a 10/10 if I was a different human being.
seraphim notes on the website Five vanillas (most of them fat and buttery vanillas cut with lean and sharp vanillas) and are blended with six different ambers which give the hypnotic part to the whole.
I saved my favourite for last! This is an absolutely gorgeous vanilla and amber blend with a hint of sweetness in the background. It feels dizzying and transformative, like one sniff could take you into a different world. I can’t pick apart any individual ambers except there’s one that smells stronger than the others and reminds me of Egyptian amber. It has that same kind of light spicy-ness that I love. 10/10 just beautiful. I definitely have some in here I want to upsize (ouija, seraphim, and midnight mass) so I can’t wait to put in my next order and explore the catalog further (haha see what I did there...)
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2020.07.09 08:50 Justwonderinif S-Town Timeline IV
< Friday, July 10, 2015
Mid July, 2015
- Reta and Charlie have put a gate across John's property with "No Trespassing" signs.
- Tyler is taking care of two of John's dogs (Pipsqueak and Madeline) in the trailer he lives in with his girlfriend, and two of Tyler's daughters.
- Tyler has to scrounge to get money to take the dogs to the vet.
- 10AM: Probate Hearing to request permanent guardianship over John's mother.
- Tyler wants to go to to the hearing to petition the probate judge to intervene.
- Tyler has a bunch of things at Johns ($25,000.00 worth) at John's house. (Tools, spray paint, tea pot, the swing set, lawnmower, welder, masonry stuff.)
- Tyler has had a falling out with his partner at the Tattoo parlor, and needs his tools.
- Tyler shows Brian a bill of sale for 2 x school buses and an 18 wheeler trailer. Tyler says these belong to him.
- Probate Court: Tyler is sitting off to the side. Brian wants to introduce himself to Reta and Charlie.
- Reta and Charlie Lawrence are at Probate Court.
- Brian introduces himself, and asks if he can talk to Reta afterwards.
- Reta says Tyler's been causing nothing but trouble, and Reta and Charlie are leaving the next day.
- Reta, Charlie, Tyler, Boozer Downs, and Judge Jerry Powell meet in Chambers. (Note: Judge Powell is one of the judges who defied the Supreme Court decision to give marriage licenses to same sex couples.)
- Tyler asks the Judge for his own things. Judge Powell explains that the hearing isn't about Tyler's stuff. It's about guardianship. Judge Powell says Tyler can take it up with Reta to get his things back.
- Reta says she can't talk to Brian now, but asks if John told Brian where his money is hid.
- Brian meets with John's attorney, Boozer Downs:
- Boozer says John told him what he wanted to do with his assets. But Boozer can't say what that is.
- Boozer says John discussed suicide.
- Boozer had suggested John get a nonprofit or historic trust to take care of the property, maze and the dogs. John replied that he spent too much money, and the person who took over would just sell it.
- Boozer won't say what John's assets are. He gets cryptic. Boozer doesn't know if John took care of his assets. John had told Boozer "The form" of what he was going to do with his assets. Boozer won't explain "the form." John had talked to Boozer about being un-banked.
- Boozer suggests that the hunt for John's assets is literally a "treasure hunt."
- Boozer suggests Brian talk to Faye Gamble, and invites Faye over to speak to Brian.
- Faye and Brian go back to her office at Town Hall
- Faye says she met John when she became town clerk ten years ago.
- Faye tells Brian about the night John killed himself and her nightmares.
- Faye will not show Brian the list of people John wanted contacted.
- Faye is vague with Brian about instructions John gave, and "certain things" John wanted her to find.
- John told Faye were to find "certain things," but Faye won't say what those "certain things" are.
- Faye says that John had previously told her about wanting to leave assets to Tyler and his brother. But that John didn't say anything about that the night he killed himself.
- Later, Faye lies to Reta and Charlie and tells them she has not talked to Brian.
- Faye will not give John's contact list or instructions list to Reta and Charlie who find this suspicious.
Less than a week after Reta Takes Ownership of the Property
- Approximate: Olin Long has not spoken to John for a year. When he calls the house phone number (that the McLemore's have had since the 1960s) is disconnected). Olin googles "John McLemore obituary" and learns of John's death via a condolence web site, six months ago.
- Tyler steals John's truck from John's property. Tyler takes John's laptop, and every piece of paperwork he can find down to birth certificates and deeds, and John's Grandfather's railroad stock papers, John's two vehicles.
- In John's house, Tyler found John's "people to contact" list. Fifteen names and numbers on the list. Reta's name, Woodstock Town Hall, Vet, and Lawyer. Tyler's name is not on the list. There's a group of names at the top. Each of those names is a mystery to Brian. Of the first seven names at the top of the list, not one of them showed up at John's funeral.
- Tyler posts John's truck on Facebook, and sells it. Someone signed John's name on the title in July, and sold the truck for $3,300.00 to someone who lives near the Mississippi state line. Tyler told the buyer that his step-dad was John B. McLemore
- Tyler posts John's Mercedes on Facebook and sells it for $900.00
End of July, 2015
- Tyler notes that Reta has sold all his tools, John's clocks, and cleaned the place out.
- Tyler has been looking for the hidden treasure, looking underneath John's house, etc. According to Tyler, John showed Tyler gold bars and was buying gold at 30k per clip. "We got to find it, Brian..."
Later in the Summer, 2015
- Tyler has been using a metal detector to search the property. Tyler says it looks like the movie "Holes" on John's property.
- Reta's neice checks on the property and sees there has been a break-in at the shop.
- Reta's neice calls Officer Jerry Lightsey who says that he's not going to come over or file a report, and Mary Grace should be calling, not Reta's neice... The next day:
- Tyler removes the 18-wheeler and two school buses from the McLemore property.
- Tyler says he showed the police his bills of sale and asked them if he could take the buses and trailer and the police said yes, he could take them.
- Tyler calls Brian while he's doing this. The buses and trailers are towed out. They are filled with lumber, a clawfoot tub and wood stove. Tyler wants to build a house on his grandmother's property.
- A friend of Reta's calls her to tell her Tyler took the buses. The next day:
- Reta and Charlie drive to Woodstock and case Miss Hick's house, taking pictures of the buses and trailers in Miss Hicks's yard.
- July 22: Reta's Photo of Property Destruction
- July 22: Buses and Trailer on Tyler's Grandmother's property
- That same day, warrant is issued for Tyler's arrest for trespassing.
- Later, Tyler leaves a message on Reta's answering machine saying, "If you don't quit driving by my house, and harassing me, I am going to fill your ass with buckshot."
- Reta visits The Woodstock Police in person.
- Jerry Lightsey says, "You have got to stop driving by Miss Hicks's house! You have got to stop harassing him, or I will arrest you!"
- Reta says, "So, Tyler can steal Mary Grace's shit, but I can't drive up and down a public road?!"
- Jerry Lightsey says, "Lady, you gotta back off!"
- Reta has pressed charges for trespassing, for theft of the trailer and buses.
- Tyler emails a photo of the "people to contact" list to Brian. Fifteen names and numbers on the list. Reta's name, Woodstock Town Hall, Vet, and Lawyer. Tyler's name is not on the list. There's a group of names at the top. Each of those names is a mystery to Brian. Of the first seven names at the top of the list, not one of them showed up at John's funeral.
- Tyler and Allen Bearden talk the day before Brian meets Allen. Allen buys off on how fishy stuff has played out.
- Brian meets with #4 on the list: Allen Bearden in Pell City, AL
- Allen says that Horologists experienced a heyday in the nineties.
- Allen says that John was out of the business in 2012, when they met. But John helped Allen fix an Elliott Grandfather clock.
- Allen says John was a master, and explains about the Elliott Grandfather clock. John had an reputation for working on high-end, world-class clocks. John was the best.
- Allen had tried to get John help, and invited him over to get out on the river. John never came. Could not get away from his mother for that long.
- Allen says it is fishy and suspicious that he was not notified and he isn't sure why Faye would want to micro-manage and control the situation. Allen suggests Brian call the other people on the list. Allen says those people are on the list for a reason.
End of August, 2015 SeptembeOctober 2015
- Approximate: Kendall Burt buys all of the McLemore property from Mary Grace.
- Brian talks to #6 on the list: Bill Maier.
- Utah Bill is a friend and clock customer of John's for decades. Bill lives in Utah in a house that is more like a museum than a house. Bill thinks it is so sad to hear that John finally did it. So incredibly sad.
- Brian talks to a Pacific Northwest friend who says that he only heard about John's death from Faye, after the funeral.
- Brian talks to Duncan Greig, a respected clock restorer from Tunbridge, England. John and Duncan had never met, but developed a friendship over the phone, and via letters.
- Brian talks to Tom Moore - John's Chemistry Professor in College, and a lifelong friend. Faye called Tom after the funeral.
- We don't know if Brian talked to the Birmingham, Alabama mechanic on the list.
- From all these conversations, Brian learns that: John helped one of his friends rebuild a clock from WWII/Greiling Germany; John worked on a clock once to the point of tears; John worked on a clock for seven years; John could recite Poe from memory; John told some of them he was running down his savings; John told some of them he had converted his money to gold and hid his money; John talked to some of them about a will.
- All John's friends feel like someone is taking advantage of the situation. They speculate about the Reta & Charlie, Faye, and the Goodsons. Brian thinks that if the Goodsons had the gold they would tell him. John's friends feel like someone is getting away with something.
- Brian visits another friend of John's named Bill (Alabama Bill) who lives in a suburban house near Bibb County.
- Just after the trespassing charge, but before the felony charges, Brian visits Tyler.
- Brian tells Tyler that if he ever finds any gold, not to tell him, because it would be public.
- August, 2015: Cheryl and Jeff's 12th Anniversary.
October 10, 2015 October 17, 2015
- Brian is at the Best Western and runs into Reta.
- Brian slips a note under her door. Reta, and Charlie and two other cousins of John's all meet with Brian in the Hotel Common Area
- Charlie thinks it is a terrible idea to talk to Brian who is just trying to pit them against Tyler.
- Reta and Charlie call Tyler a con man and note that the buses and 18-wheeler were on John's property before Tyler's bill of sale.
- Brian asks about the text message from John. Reta thinks it was sent by Tyler, from John's computer.
- Faye Gamble has not shown Reta and Charlie the list of instructions from John.
- Boozer Downs was supposed to take a written statement from Faye about what John said the night he committed suicide, but he still hasn't done it. Reta and Charlie are suspicious of Boozer.
- Reta and Charlie think that Boozer is in cahoots with Tyler.
- Brian asks where Mary Grace is and Reta won't say.
- Tyler suggests that Boozer is in cahoots with Reta and Charlie to suppress the will and steal the gold.
- Boozer Downs emails Brian asking to retract his interview:
- It got ugly in the hearing. I'm concerned that I should not have spoken to you on the recording
- Boozer says he did not hide the will, because there was no will to hide.
- One of John's friends emails Brian and says, "Maybe I knew too much."
- Allen Bearden feels like someone has taken John's gold, and somebody got it, and there is a cover-up happening. Allen thinks someone has the gold.
- Brian visits Faye Gamble a second time:
- Faye insists she called everyone before the funeral, right there from City Hall.
- Brian gives Faye an out and tells her maybe she was too traumatized. Faye insists that that wasn't it, and she called everyone on the list, before the funeral.
- Faye says she has finally given the list to Reta and Charlie.
- Faye says Reta is lying, and she never told them she didn't speak to Brian.
- During this second interview, Reta reveals that John told her that his gold was wrapped in a towel in the freezer.
- Fay says she told the police that John said there was gold in a towel in the freezer.
- Faye said she didn't look in the freezer, suspects Tyler, and knows things she can't talk about.
- Brian visits K-3 Lumber and talks to Kabrahm:
- Records the story in Kabrahm's own words, for the podcast.
- Brian said he talked to Kabrahm about a year after his first visit to Alabama. (This places the Kabrahm interview in SeptembeOctober of 2015.)
- Approximate: Brian interviews Cheryl Acker Dodson and Jeff Dodson.
- Brian gets an email from Olin Long, who was not on the contact list. Olin Long would like to listen to the radio episode when it airs. The two arrange an interview.
Monday, November 9, 2015
- Approximate: Tyler gets a temporary job at a factory in Georgia.
- Approximate: Mary Grace goes on a River Boat trip, and a trip to Gatlinburg, TN. Mary Grace has gained 18 pounds.
Mid November, 2015
- Approximate (Four months after John died): Woodstock Town Hall: Tyler's Court Hearing for misdemeanor trespassing for taking the buses and 18-wheel trailer.
- Reta and Charlie are present. A special prosecutor is called in from out of town. And Tyler's attorney is here from Bessemer.
- Tyler is not present because of the job in Georgia. Tyler is slapped with a Failure to Appear.
- Town Hall Parking Lot: Reta and Brian talk. Reta thinks Tyler has been taking advantage of 89-year-old Mary Grace.
- Reta has found one bank account with 98 dollars in it. Reta thinks that the 18-wheeler and buses could have helped pay for Mary Grace's care.
- Brian refers to Mary Grace as John's legal heir when court records show that everything was in Mary Grace's name and John was Mary Grace's heir.
- Reta thinks that John was forced by Tyler to drink cyanide... was cheered on. She told the police she thinks they dropped the ball.
- Reta speculates that John and Tyler had an argument. Reta thinks that Tyler is a thief who has ransacked the house.
- Reta has tried to track John's gold by calling the mint and the US Treasury.
- Reta has John's baby book that includes: Report Cards, Birth Certificate, Family Pictures, and Class Photos. She offers to make copies for Brian.
- Reta tells John about Mary Grace's weight gain and trips and how Mary Grace is doing better than she had under John's care. Reta says John had boarded up the windows in Mary Grace's room, and Mary Grace has lost ten years.
- Reta is mad at herself that she didn't put two and two together.
End of November 2015
- Approximate: Brian interviews Mr. Not-A-Good-Person. His wife looks over the shoulder. The man says that John wanted a partner.
- Brian asks if the relationship was sexual and the man says it wasn't sexual, but John might have wanted to.
- There is speculation that Mr. Not-A-Good-Person is Tyler's father, Rodney, due to shared mannerisms.
- A grand jury has indicted Tyler on a felony count for theft of the 18-wheeler, and the buses full of lumber and antiques. Exact date of the indictment unclear
- Approximate: Reta has asked the police to look into John's missing truck and Mercedes. The Woodstock police came back to Reta and told her that "Everything was fine. The vehicles belong to Tyler."
Mid December 2015
- Tyler goes to pick up his youngest daughter and the girl's mother won't give Tyler his daughter. Tyler breaks down the door, and the police are called. A gun is involved, and Tyler is arrested for "armed burglary."
- Approximate: Tyler lures an electrician to the house he's building from John's lumber and trailer.
- Tyler threatens to cut off his fingers for stealing his grandfather's guns.
- Tyler beat the guy up. And didn't cut his fingers off.
- Mary Grace's 89th Birthday
December 15, 2015 December 17, 2015 Sunday, December 20, 2015
- Brian interviews Olin Long for five hours in a hotel in Birmingham, Alabama (and six hours the next day.) Total 11 hours.
Monday, December 21, 2015
- Tyler's mother messages Brian on Facebook and says Tyler will be in jail on Monday. Brian calls and talks to Tyler's maternal grandmother, Miss Irene Hicks, since Tyler's mother isn't up to talking.
- Tyler has nine felony charges against him.
- Tyler has a fourth baby on the way with his current girlfriend, Cami.
- Tyler's mother, Maya, is supported by Tyler's grandmother.
- Tyler and his kids and Cami are living in a half-finished house in Miss Hicks's yard.
- Tyler has a court date for the armed burglary charge. Tyler pays his $1,000.00 bond and leaves.
- Tyler's forgery and theft case are scheduled to go to trial in early summer 2017.
- Charlie's father has moved in with Reta and Charlie, after surgery.
- Reta calls Brian, and they talk for three house. Reta is trying to get some information.
- Reta isn't sure who she can trust and who she can't trust at the Woodstock Police.
- Reta has discovered that Tyler has sold John's Truck and Mercedes. The State has revoked the title to the truck. The man who bought the truck agrees to give the truck to Reta.
- Reta believes someone in the police department is feeding Tyler information. Reta has not told the police that she's uncovered the sales of these vehicles, because she thinks the police are feeing Tyler information.
- Brian tells Reta how Tyler sees her. Brian finds that in contrast with how Reta comes off to him.
- Brian calls the Woodstock police and eventually visits Woodstock:
- Officer Lightsey refuses to speak to Brian.
- Police Chief Len Price says that Tyler was told he couldn't take anything from the house until matters were settled in Probate Court.
- Police Chief Len Price says that the town of Woodstock had to pay to clean up the suicide scene.
- Police Chief Len Price says that the cops didn't find any money or gold in John's house.
- Brian learns that Jerry Lightsey is a family friend of Tyler's. Lightsey is especially good friends with Tyler's mother, Maya. And comes to Miss Hicks's house regularly.
- Tyler gave Officer Jerry Lightsey a tour of the house he is building using items he took from John's property.
- Jerry Lightsey was winking and implying that the trailer was a "different trailer" not John's trailer.
- Maya tells Brian that Jerry Lightsey is stressed over Tyler's legal situation, and that Jerry is eagerly waiting to retire in 2017. Jerry is tired of having to choose between his friends and his job.
- Reta says it was "during this time" that she "spilled her guts" to Brian Reed.
- February 16: Reta and Charlie meet with the ADA in Centerville. The ADA wants Reta to return for the grand jury on February 24.
- February 24: At the grand jury, Tyler is charges with the theft of two vehicles, two buses, one trailer and the lumber stored in the trailer.
- During this trip, Reta makes the decision to sell the McLemore house and property that had been in Mary Grace's family for over 100 years. According to Reta: There was no way I could stop the trespassing and vandalizing of the house and property. Every time I went over there, it was another window broken, another broken lock, just pure meanness! We were taking one step forward and three steps backwards. I had dealt with the odor, the heat, the cold, the dampness, dead rats, and destruction long enough. I really felt that I would get a call any day telling me the house had been burned down. I just could not take it anymore. My mind was made up, I had no choice but to sell the place. Of course, the financial situation was another reason. It really broke my heart.
- April 1: Reta makes a deal to sell the house to the Burt's.
- April 16: Reta is back in Alabama. Mary Grace had been referred to a surgeon concerning her lifelong condition on her leg, so, I wanted to be there to discuss her options with the doctor. She let him know quickly he was not cutting on her leg. And I [Reta] totally agreed.
- We moved more stuff from Mary Grace’s to storage, boarded up another window that had been broken out and then I called an Auctioneer to come and pick up anything that was left. At this point I felt I had done all I could do.
- April 26: Reta heads back to Florida.
- August 11: The sale of the house closes.
- June 7: Cheryl turns 44
- August: Cheryl and Jeff's 13th Anniversary.
- August 23: Jeff Dodson elected mayor of Woodstock.
- March 15: John’s 51st Birthday
- Tyler is 25 years old
- Michael Fuller is 46
- Rodney is 47
- Tuesday, March 28: S-town Podcast Released
- April 4: New Complaint Against Tyler filed
- Wednesday, April 5: Tyler shoots Skyler's dog in front of her kids. He says Skyler's dog was trying to hurt John's dog, Pipsqueak
- April 10: Tyler's Current Tattoo/Piercing Establishment
- May 21 (Approximate): At Green Pond Cemetery John gets a head stone
- June 1: Cheryl posts photographs of items Kellye Burt allowed her to take from the house.
- June 7: Cheryl turns 45 years old.
- June 10: Criminal proceedings pushed to Fall; while prosecutors seek permission to use podcast recordings against Tyler.
Initially, Goodson was charged with five counts of first-degree theft of property, two counts of first-degree forgery, one count of third-degree trespassing and one count of second-degree possession of a forged instrument. However, a grand jury met in April and brought the number of charges up to 25, including 13 second-degree criminal trespass charges, two counts of burglary and two charges of forgery.
This month, a new indictment will be coming down that will replace the April indictment, taking off five of the criminal trespass charges, changing the forgery charges to possession of a forgery instrument and would include victims as being Mary Grace, McLemore and any of McLemore’s heirs. Jones said the additional charges came after he and his team listened to “S-Town” and heard Goodson talk about some of the things he took from the property.
- Wednesday, June 14: Tyler arrested for the early April 6 shooting of Jake and Skyler's pit bull. Apparently, Jake's pit bull had John's dog Pipsqueak, in his jaws, and was shaking him, trying to kill him. As the story goes, Jake was holding his pit bull by his collar, and Tyler shot the pit bull in the head. Tyler subsequently paid over $1,000 dollars to get Pipsqueak out of the vet. Jake did not press charges, but the police investigated the shooting, and ultimately arrested Tyler.
- June 16: Original date for Tyler's trial now pushed to Falll. Tyler faces charges for trespassing, for theft of the busses, 18-wheeler, truck and Mercedes. Tyler also faces forgery charges for forging John's signature when he sold the truck and Mercedes.
- June 16: New York Times covers Tyler's arrest for shooting Jake's dog
- Tyler feels like he has done nothing wrong. He has bills of sale for the buses and 18 wheeler.
- Tyler says the police told him he could take the buses and 18-wheeler.
- Tyler says there is no way they can prove he forged anything. But he said that when he didn't know that Reta had found out about the truck and Mercedes.
- June 19: Tyler released an on $21,000 bond for animal cruelty and reckless endangerment
- August: Cheryl and Jeff's 14th Anniversary.
- October 16: Tyler pleads guilty to theft
- November: Mary Grace's 91st Birthday
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